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The Transformative Path to Finding Inner Peace

Hey there, mamas! In this episode, I sit down for a heart-to-heart with relationship coach Erin Jean. Together, we dive deep into Erin's own rollercoaster ride of marriage woes and self-discovery, uncovering some seriously eye-opening lessons we can all learn from:


  • Getting Real with Yourself: Discover how strengthening your bond with yourself is the secret sauce for turning around tricky relationships.

  • Inner Child TLC: Ever thought about giving your inner child a little love? Erin spills the beans on why digging into past hurts can be game-changing for your emotional well-being and your relationships.

  • Chill Out Techniques: Learn some down-to-earth tips for calming those frazzled nerves so you can make better decisions and handle those mommy meltdowns with grace.

  • One Person, Big Impact: Yep, you read that right! Find out how just one person doing the work can totally transform a relationship for the better. Erin's own marriage makeover is proof positive!

Here's a review of Erin's practical steps to find peace both within yourself AND in your relationships:

1. Dive into Your Subconscious: Ever heard of the subconscious mind? Well, Joe Dispenza is the go-to guy for learning all about it. Take a deep dive into understanding how your mind works behind the scenes.  Check out this video from Dr. Joe Dispenza to learn more about the subconscious mind.


2. Tech Time-Out: When you’re feeling all fight or flight, technology can be a real buzzkill. Tune in to your body’s signals, ditch the scrolling, and opt for a few minutes of zen time. Cue up some classical tunes, take a nature stroll, soak in a bubbly bath, and, most importantly, stash away that phone!


3. Spot the Patterns: Noticed a recurring theme in your arguments? It’s time to play detective and uncover those pesky patterns. Whether it’s money matters or household chores, pinpointing the triggers can be a game-changer.


4. Embrace Your Emotions: When the heat’s on, it’s easy to get swept away by emotions. Take a step back and recognize what’s really going on. Are you feeling inadequate or undervalued? It’s all about tuning into your inner emotional compass.


5. Tap into Childhood Memories: Ever wondered why certain situations hit you right in the feels? Take a trip down memory lane and explore those childhood moments when you felt less than enough. Understanding where it all began can be a powerful step toward healing.


6. Nurture Your Inner Child: That little version of you? She needs some love and attention too. Grab a journal and jot down a heart-to-heart conversation, using your non-dominant hand to tap into new pathways of understanding. Give yourself some grace, with hands over heart and a validating mantra to soothe the soul. Because, mama, you’re doing the best you can!


So, grab a cuppa, settle in, and get ready to be inspired to take charge of your own journey toward happier, healthier relationships. Because, mama, you've got this!

Resources Mentioned In The Show
  • Link to Erin's FREE guided tapping meditation, Erin calls it a "soothing balm for frayed emotions" :

  • Connect with Erin using these links:

  • Check out Erin's podcast, The Business of Inner Peace

  • Click here to watch a video and learn more about the subconscious mind from Dr. Joe Dispenza.

  • Want to give yourself the gift of MORE TIME?  Get AT LEAST 5 hours back/week by doing a time audit.  Don't know where to start?  I've got you covered! For access to my FREE TIME AUDIT TOOL click here.

  • Click here for your FREE DECLUTTERING CHECKLIST.

  • Click here to join The Mom-entum Podcast Private Facebook Community

  • Please subscribe, rate and review the show to help me reach and support more amazing moms just like you! Click here to learn how.


Tanya: alright. Hello, and welcome to the momentum podcast the show dedicated to inspiring, uplifting, and empowering women on their journey through motherhood. I'm your host, Tanya Valentine, and I'm so grateful you are here. I've got a great show for you today. We are talking relationships, and the quality of our life is equal to the quality of our relationships. We were put on this earth



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Tanya: to be in relationship with one another. So if the relationships in your life are a little rocky, then this is a show for you.



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Tanya: And today I'm talking with relationship. Coach Erin. Jean, who has over a decade of expertise in the natural health and personal growth industry.



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Tanya: She has been married for over 20 years and is a mom to 3 children. Erin is also an author host of the business of inner peace podcasts.



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Tanya: a certified hypnotherapist.



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Tanya: certified natural wellness, coach, and she has been trained in and nlp timeline therapy eft and emotional clearing.



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Tanya: She specializes in using subconscious healing tools to help her clients overcome limiting beliefs and achieve their goals.



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Tanya: She's developed her own unique method for achieving inner peace, which has helped many transform their lives and live a more fulfilling existence. Welcome to the show, Erin. Thank you so much for being here, Tonya. I'm super excited to be here. I know I'm super excited to have you on, and it's my pleasure. And let's just dive right in can you just introduce yourself and tell your story of what led you to become a relationship coach?



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Erin Jean: Yeah. Ii as you mentioned. I'm a relationship coach, and I specialize in subconscious healing, which really is the thing that



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sets me apart.



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Erin Jean: And my journey is mostly around my marriage. I was in a really just, difficult marriage. My husband was verbally and emotionally abusive.



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Erin Jean: It took me a while to even figure that out, to like. Figure out what was going on.



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Quickly, at the start of our marriage, II think by year 2 I started going to therapy on my own and



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Erin Jean: therapy really helped me kind of identify what was happening.



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but it didn't get me out of the situation like I was hoping it would. I was really hoping it was going to change what was happening. And I sort of lived in this



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Erin Jean: very unhappy marriage.



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raising little kids and feeling super alone



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Erin Jean: with this mentality that I was kind of waiting for someone to come along and save me.  And it just wasn't working



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no one. No one was coming to save me, and so I just hit like bottom I've been doing, I mean, my husband started coming to counseling with me at 1 point. We done a couple of marriage retreats. I did a lot of self help, books around marriage and all of that stuff.



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Erin Jean: and it just nothing was changing the situation. I really hit Rock bottom. We had a big argument, and it was kind of like the last straw for me and the people in my world that I was seeking help from.



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Erin Jean: We're really helping me identify that my husband



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Erin Jean: it like, wasn't healthy, right, wasn't a healthy situation, and I felt like the best thing to do was I needed to leave and get a divorce. And that's basically what I did. I left. I filed for a divorce, and, like the hardest time period of my entire life. Then ensued, and I started struggling with like suicidal thoughts. I just I was not myself. It was so hard to show up and be a mom for my kids.



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I just felt like I was losing my mind. I was losing myself. and I was desperate.



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Erin Jean: This kind of was like my very first holiday season. I had to go through without my husband and our family being a unit. It was just like, Oh, it was the worst ever! And by the time we hit New Year's



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Erin Jean: I was feeling like not sure that I could really keep myself on the planet like really struggling with suicidal thoughts, and it was supposed to be the first time I was like going to be without my kids. They were gonna be with my husband. And I just reached out to my husband in desperation, and was like, Can I be with you guys cause I'm scared to



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Erin Jean: be alone.



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Erin Jean: And thankfully, he agreed, which was kind of amazing because we hadn't talked in months.



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Erin Jean:  And that night we ended up just getting to talk after the kids went to bed, and we decided to try one more time.



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So we brought our family unit back together.



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Erin Jean: and I kinda thought, Oh, like life's gonna get better now, and it got worse.



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Erin Jean: I like the thoughts got worse. The death, like depression got worse. And so I hit this place where I basically knew that I, the big issue for me is I just didn't love myself.



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I couldn't have been. I couldn't justify any other reason for being in a relationship where I'd let somebody treat me this way



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Erin Jean: if I loved myself right. And I just got super desperate to like. Figure out how to love myself.



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And the only thing I could identify that wasn't working



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Erin Jean: was therapy. I was like I've done at this point almost 20 years of therapy, and it's just not helping me move the needle forward. And so I got really open.



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Erin Jean: so like trying anything that was not traditional. I'm over this. I like, I can tell you what's not working so anyhow, it just started this quest. And I started gobbling up like every sort of alternative



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tool that there was. I'm I'm a Christian, and I feel like in in my Christian world. They would get being labeled as like New Ag or whatever I just didn't care.



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Erin Jean: I was like, I don't care. I'm gonna try everything. And the cool thing is all of the stuff that I started doing. It started working like it was a really changing me and how I felt. And I you know, I went into it not with a goal, really, to save my marriage, I was all about saving myself right? Cause I'm like, I'm a mama to 3 kids. I gotta be on this planet for them. I gotta show them what it looks like to love yourself and how you should live life in that way. Right? So I was focused on that.



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Erin Jean: And the really happy, beautiful, miraculous side effect was, my husband started changing, and our whole marriage started to change as I just did this work on myself



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Erin Jean: I hit this point. I remember specifically being in a coaching session with this beautiful coach that I loved, and she said to me, Erin.



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Erin Jean: you're a life coach.



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I was like what like it totally came out of left field.



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Erin Jean: but it did resonate with me. Part of this journey to like learning to love myself was I was doing all kinds of things to learn about myself, so I don't know if you've ever heard of the Gallup strength test.



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Erin Jean: So I did that test. And I'm a relationship builder. That's kind of a quadrant that I fall in. And coaching was right in my top 10. So



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it resonated with me



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Erin Jean: to. Yeah.



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Tanya: Sorry and good thing this isn't live, cause I I'll be editing this out. Hi! What is it that you want? I gave them snacks and a drink and put on a movie.



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You go ahead



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Tanya: alright, buddy. I'm on a call, so we gotta be quiet. Okay.



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Tanya: okay, alright sorry.



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Erin Jean: Right back right back to it, right back to it.



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Tanya: So you were talking about Gallup, and you found out your relationships. Builder. Yes, yes. And when she said to me that you know I was a life coach, it really was like



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Erin Jean: out of left field, but it also resonated with me. And that's kind of the thing that started me on this path.



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Erin Jean: And as I began to take inventory when you're an entrepreneur. They always want you to niche down and kind of narrow your message to who you're talking to.



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Erin Jean: and I evaluated my life at that point. I was like 2 years into this kind of work, and I could see that the thing that changed in my life the most was my marriage. My marriage was



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Erin Jean: completely different. So I'm married to the same man who's not the same man, and I am not the same woman. And it started this quest of like, I. I'm a relationship coach, and I want to help women do exactly what I did. I want to help them to save their marriage



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Erin Jean: really, by saving themselves.



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And this



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Erin Jean: happy, miraculous side effect is that my husband was changed. And



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Erin Jean: as I started kind of on this quest of helping women do that it wasn't just me like part of me was scared that it was. I was the one off case.



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Erin Jean: like maybe it was just a miracle for just me, but as I've had client after client like, they have very similar stories where their marriages are completely different now, and their husbands show up totally different, and we don't work with husbands. I only work with wives right? So to see these women's lives change from the inside out where they're new people, and the profound effect that it has on their families and marriages is just



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Tanya: been the coolest thing. So that's that's how I got here, and what a beautiful thing to like. I feel like that would give so many women listening just like this glimmer of hope.



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Tanya: because there's so much in this world that's completely like out of our control. But when you say, like, only one person needs to do the work to make the change like that, I totally agree with that, by the way, and it resonates with me. But can you explain why? That is that only one person needs to do the work to change in a relationship in order for that relationship to be transformed and to improve.



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Erin Jean: Yeah, absolutely. I love this. And I say this to my clients all the time. Marriage. It's like math.



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Erin Jean: and literally, you know right now, if you and your husband are each a one, then one plus one equals 2.



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But if you do this work and you change, and you become a 3



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Erin Jean: well, 3 plus one is 4, right? You can't have 2 anymore. It's not possible. It's like mathematically impossible, right? When that number changes, and it's the same as it is in the physical. It's the same in the spiritual



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when we do this work, and we really figure out



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Erin Jean: subconsciously what is the programming, what has been going on? And it's ruling our life that's causing us to make decisions and have patterns and programs that are sort of repeating, even though we don't want them to



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Erin Jean: in our life, that we're just like banging our head against a wall like, I'm so sick of having the same argument right? All of those things have to do with your subconscious programming, and who you are. So when you can first identify that programming



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Erin Jean: and then begin to rewire it and change it, you show up different. You might have the same quote unquote argument, starting right, but as a different person, you're going to respond completely differently.



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Then that throws your partner off



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Erin Jean: because they can't.



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Erin Jean: They can't play their role. If you're not playing your role right? And you can't have the same argument anymore. It shifts. And you know, slowly, over time, you learn how to deal with new situations and new responses. And it's just this beautiful healing practice



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Erin Jean: that together you can both become better because one person was willing to step out there and do the work. And it works in any relationship, not just a marriage, right? It works in friendships and parenting dynamics, all kinds of places when we make this choice and we step out and we decide that we're gonna figure it out. And we're gonna be different.



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Erin Jean: No one can be the same around you.



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Erin Jean: You're not willing to do the same types of patterns. Does that make sense



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Tanya: totally? It's like, Well, you are a changed person. You're a different person. So yeah, they're gonna interact with you in a different way, or a new person.



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Tanya: Umhm.



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Tanya: alright. And I also wanted to talk about this, that, you know I've heard of people who have been to marriage counseling, and you know they say that they were advised to



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Tanya: tell each other what their needs are, and then you expect that other person to then, now that they know what your needs are, that person needs to fulfill your needs.



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Tanya: And I was just curious. What is your take on this approach?



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Well, if you're dealing with like 2 really healthy people, right that are both wanting to be their best.



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Erin Jean: That approach is going to work great.



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Erin Jean: Unfortunately, if you're if you're in counseling, chances are you're not healthy people. Actually, if you're human, chances are yeah. You're not healthy people and you know.



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Erin Jean: sometimes, if we don't understand what's going on inside of us



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Erin Jean: back to kind of like, II just geek out on the subconscious mind and the subconscious programming like just a little peek into that. It's coming from your childhood, right? And so if you're not even aware what your real needs are.



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Erin Jean: What's really going on. You might communicate one thing right. But like, even if your husband actually does the one thing, it's not gonna solve for the feeling that's going on inside of you. Because this the stuff that's going on inside of you. It's actually coming from an unmet need of a little girl.



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Erin Jean: Right? If you don't get that, what's happening. Then, even saying I just need you to show up and help with the laundry.



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Tanya: and then your husband does that and helps with the laundry. It's not gonna fix that yucky feeling inside. No? Then it's you're gonna find something else to be bothered about. Yeah, it's like



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Erin Jean: that other person. It's not your husband's job to make you happy if you are not to make you happy. Yeah, a hundred percent. And that's the other part of the issue. There is that when we are looking to have someone else meet our needs right, we are going to end up disappointed. And the thing is, it's really only God and us



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Erin Jean: that can partner together to meet those needs.



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Erin Jean: But I feel like even taking one step back is really figuring out what



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Erin Jean: what's going on inside of you. What's the real need? Because, like, it probably has nothing to do with these surface things like, you know.



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laundry or showing up on time or helping with the kids, like all those things that we desire. And we think is the problem like, it's really not. The problem like somewhere inside of you is this unmet need of a little girl? And your husband can't meet that need. You really can't.



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And it's you and God that have to do the work and figure it out.



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Tanya: Yeah, I love that. And I'm sure that there's I'm just imagining the people listening



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Tanya: like wanting to know. Okay.



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Tanya: that's great. But like, where do I even get started? Like, how do I? How do I find



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Tanya: this out. How do I find myself? How do I



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Tanya: discover this unmet need?



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Tanya: Because so many we don't. We don't know.



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Erin Jean: Yeah, yeah, a hundred percent. This is the place where I really think you do have to work with a coach. So step one is starting. Just learn about the subconscious mind. Understand it right and Dr. Joe dispense as a great resource for that. You could go on Youtube and watch some of his stuff. There's a lot of things out there now about the subconscious mind. So once you understand, like what the subconscious mind is in charge of, like how subconscious programming works.



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Erin Jean: That's kind of like step one. And it's really easy to identify, like someone else's subconscious programming, like, you know, especially somebody, you know. Well, you're like.



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Erin Jean: Oh, yeah, I could see how this happened to them as a little kid, and now it's affecting who they are, but it's very difficult to see your own. And so, working with a coach I feel like is so helpful because they can just kinda hold up a mirror and shine a light on something for you to help. You see, like, here's what I see is really going on. You know.



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Erin Jean: it's hard to see it's that saying



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Tanya: that you can't see what is it? You can't see the woods, or you can't see the forest through the trees right? It's hard to see when you're in it. Yeah, it is really hard to see when you're in it. And



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Erin Jean: you know.



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Erin Jean: the the reality of being a mom is that you're tired. You're meeting a whole bunch of people's needs all the time you tend to put our own needs



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Erin Jean: last, and you just feel like, no, the real problem is helping with laundry right? Cause you're exhausted, and it's even hard to imagine putting energy towards this kind of work right?



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Erin Jean: But I would just have to say, like, you are so



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Erin Jean: worth it. You are worth making the time to love on yourself and to figure it out. And if you're like me, or waiting for somebody to come along and save you from the situation.



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I'm here today to tell you



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Erin Jean: it's you.



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Erin Jean: You are the only one like, I said, with God



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Erin Jean: that can actually save you from the situation. So



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Erin Jean: you can decide today, or you can wait till tomorrow, or you can wait till 20 years into a miserable marriage to decide that you're ready, and you're worth it. But I would encourage you to start now as soon as possible. Yeah, yeah.



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Tanya: I agree. So let's get right into it. So for anybody listening today? If there's somebody out there listening who is not happy in their relationship.



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Tanya: can we? You may be



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Tanya: discuss like 3 tangible things that our listeners can do this week. That would help.



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Erin Jean: Yeah, absolutely. So I would say, the biggest thing is, you need to understand what your body physically needs when you've gone into that fight, flight or freeze mode, right? Which stress can put us into that a conflict can put us into that.



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Erin Jean: And just really understanding that you legitimately need to calm down your nervous system.



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Erin Jean: It's going to help. You have a really clear head and make decisions from the front part of your brain, which is the part of your brain that rules like analytics, logic and decision making.



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And the back part of our brain. It's where that fight flight or freezes at.



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Erin Jean: And the interesting thing is that our brain actually can't function both sides at the same time. So you're either in the front. And you're using logic and making good decisions. Or you're in the back. And you're in that fight flight or freeze. And basically in that mode, you can only be told what to do



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Erin Jean: like. You can follow instructions, but you can't really make good decisions. And I just think, as mamma's. we wanna live as much of our life in that front part of our brain as we can, because we're in charge of keeping little ones alive and safe. Right? So we wanna make good decisions. So I think that that's kind of step one, it's really important to understand that



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and know that like, your brain needs a minimum of 20 min to switch and to like. Get all of those hormones, the stress hormones and adrenaline and all of that to leave the brain.



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Erin Jean: And you cannot do that by scrolling on your phone.



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You cannot do that by watching TV.



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Erin Jean: Right? You really need to take a minute to



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Erin Jean: a few minutes to reset.



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and ways that you can reset are like listening to classical music going outside in nature.



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Erin Jean: taking a walk, maybe taking a bubble bath.



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You know those are things that are gonna really help calm you down. And you can start to figure out for you like, what is the tool that helps you calm the fastest.



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But I just think that that's it's so key for people to understand and really step one.



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Erin Jean: Because if you're not making every decision from this logical part of your brain.



00:23:06.430 --> 00:23:32.020

Erin Jean: Chances are you're gonna go down like a road of disaster. Right? So step one is just figuring out. Start to recognize. Oh, my gosh! I'm totally in fight, flight, or freeze mode right, and see what that is which again, it's like the stress. Or you just had an argument or something like that. So recognize that you're in that mode and then start doing these steps. Give yourself a minimum of 20 min



00:23:32.060 --> 00:24:01.160

Erin Jean: to do the shift and like, literally put your phone away because phones do not help us at all with this. Get your phone away from you. Yeah, don't. Don't go have a conversation with your mom or your girlfriend about it, cause it's gonna keep you in. It's just gonna yes, fuel the fire. It really will. So you need to just go have that some form.



00:24:01.430 --> 00:24:06.070

quiet and relaxation, and allow your brain to do the reset



00:24:06.090 --> 00:24:16.670

Erin Jean: right. And once you've got that, now you're in your logical mind, right? The next thing that I'd start thinking about is



00:24:16.850 --> 00:24:19.210

Erin Jean: okay, where is that? What pattern?



00:24:19.460 --> 00:24:29.420

Erin Jean: What pattern is present in whatever relationship it is that you're trying to change right? So look for a pattern. We always fight about this or that.



00:24:29.660 --> 00:24:35.250

Erin Jean: and in the pattern. The key here is to recognize the emotion.



00:24:35.750 --> 00:24:41.410

Erin Jean: So, okay, we always fight about money. Let's say that's a common one, right?



00:24:41.820 --> 00:24:51.099

Erin Jean: But I really want you to just sit with. how am I actually feeling inside when we're fighting about the money?



00:24:51.540 --> 00:24:52.570

Tanya: Right?



00:24:52.770 --> 00:24:58.420

Erin Jean: Because it's really not about whatever that surface fight is. It's about the layer underneath.



00:24:58.730 --> 00:25:04.310

Erin Jean: I could say for myself, I often feel like inadequate.



00:25:04.440 --> 00:25:05.980

like, I'm not enough



00:25:06.070 --> 00:25:09.050

Erin Jean: when when the money topic comes up.



00:25:09.250 --> 00:25:19.649

Erin Jean: And it's like a reflection. People feel that way. Yeah, yeah, like a reflection of your self worth. And then there's this like invitation there



00:25:19.780 --> 00:25:23.089

of like, okay, so where in childhood



00:25:23.700 --> 00:25:28.400

Erin Jean: did I feel inadequate or not enough.



00:25:29.000 --> 00:25:41.190

Erin Jean: right? And that's kind of like the first little red flag waving at you like, I'm over here. Yeah, where you can go. Okay, there's something here to be looked at.



00:25:41.920 --> 00:25:46.559

Erin Jean: and then the last thing I would say is like so as much as you can



00:25:46.950 --> 00:25:58.350

Erin Jean: start to help that little version of yourself. You know it's it is essentially inner child work, subconscious healing. It's all the same thing with just different names.



00:25:58.710 --> 00:26:02.609

Erin Jean: But that's what you're after is



00:26:02.790 --> 00:26:11.500

Erin Jean: taking some time with that little version of yourself and hearing that little version of yourself.



00:26:11.680 --> 00:26:17.710

So there's a lot of fun ways that you can do it. I love having people journal.



00:26:17.810 --> 00:26:21.519

Erin Jean: and you can journal with your non-dominant hand.



00:26:21.720 --> 00:26:23.260

Tanya: So



00:26:23.300 --> 00:26:35.620

Erin Jean: yeah, I'm right handed. So I would journal with my left hand. What happens there is that you're opening up some new neural pathways because your brain is not used to using that hand.



00:26:35.630 --> 00:26:51.739

Erin Jean: and in that it's almost like a little gateway to the subconscious mind. Right? It's a new way for the subconscious to kind of speak so you could ask a question. So say, it's like, I'm feeling not enough. If you figure that part out. So then with your journal, you would say.



00:26:51.750 --> 00:27:03.969

Erin Jean: Ok, I would literally say to myself, Okay, little Erin like, why did you feel naughty enough? And then just start writing with the non-dominant hand, and you'll be surprised some pretty amazing things will come out.



00:27:04.490 --> 00:27:16.449

Erin Jean: The cool thing is, when you look at it, it actually looks like a little kid wrote it. Because, oh, my gosh, that's so funny. Yeah, because you're it's your non dominant hand, and it's a way for that



00:27:16.600 --> 00:27:20.330

Erin Jean: part of you to have a voice and to speak to you



00:27:20.980 --> 00:27:30.769

Erin Jean: sometimes even just that can feel so healing to sit with that right if you're more of a conversation person like myself.



00:27:30.810 --> 00:27:44.849

Erin Jean: I literally have had moments where I had a conversation with little me and it's been more where I got triggered like it's happened a lot with my parents like I'm in a situation with my parents, and they did something. It totally



00:27:44.900 --> 00:27:54.080

Erin Jean: triggered me. Next thing you know, I'm in a bathroom crying right? You're like just overwhelmed and crying, and in that



00:27:54.140 --> 00:28:04.309

Erin Jean: space by myself, totally looked like a crazy person, but it helped me so much. I had a conversation with little me, and just said, like, How old are you right now.



00:28:04.520 --> 00:28:07.829

Erin Jean: right and just. The answer came so quick. I'm 9



00:28:08.160 --> 00:28:17.370

Erin Jean: right and just like having this back and forth like, Well, why are you so upset and really kind of getting to the bottom of what was going on for



00:28:17.610 --> 00:28:20.349

Erin Jean: me as a little girl, and how that



00:28:20.370 --> 00:28:28.189

Erin Jean: part of me was showing up again. So those are just kind of some practical things that you could play with on your own.



00:28:29.000 --> 00:28:42.770

And I'd say to just no matter what way you discover, always giving yourself grace like so much grace. I love putting hands over heart and taking a deep breath.



00:28:42.950 --> 00:28:47.640

Erin Jean: and whatever it is that came up validating it and saying.



00:28:47.990 --> 00:28:51.359

Erin Jean: of course, you would feel that way. Yeah.



00:28:51.630 --> 00:29:02.560

Erin Jean: right? Because we often wanna tell ourselves you're so stupid like, why do you feel this way. This is ridiculous. You should be blah blah blah! You should this you should that.



00:29:02.650 --> 00:29:12.499

Erin Jean: and just I give you full permission that no matter how you feel and how silly it seems to just validate it



00:29:12.830 --> 00:29:23.950

Erin Jean: like that's kind of what every little kid wants right when they're having a little tantrum, because they're crying, cause their piece of gum fell on the ground, or something that you just think is ridiculous.



00:29:23.990 --> 00:29:37.009

Erin Jean: Yeah, to us it's ridiculous, but to us it's ridiculous that it's not, and a little kid wants to be validated like. Oh, my gosh! Of course you would feel that way. Of course she would be so upset.



00:29:37.280 --> 00:29:39.290

Erin Jean: So give yourself that gift.



00:29:39.880 --> 00:29:45.220

Tanya: Yeah. Oh, my God, I love this. I find it so fascinating. This inner child work.



00:29:45.260 --> 00:29:55.569

Tanya: Yeah. okay, well, we're about at time. So as we wrap up is there anything on your heart that you would like to share with the audience before we sign off?



00:29:56.510 --> 00:30:03.649

You know, I just I want to remind you again that you are worth it. You're worth doing this work.



00:30:03.770 --> 00:30:08.929

Erin Jean: It has just been an honor to be here, you know. Thank you for having me.



00:30:08.990 --> 00:30:14.620

I'm hoping that our conversation today has provided some valuable insights, and



00:30:14.830 --> 00:30:25.109

Erin Jean: you know, if you're resonating with what we've discussed, or you find yourself. You're identifying some of these things. I just want to offer to the audience that



00:30:25.220 --> 00:30:34.929

Erin Jean: you know. If you want a little guidance, and you're grappling with maybe tension or conflict or emotional blockages. I do have a resource for you.



00:30:34.950 --> 00:30:41.139

I would love to invite you to experience, tapping, otherwise known as EFT.



00:30:41.540 --> 00:31:14.029

Erin Jean: And it's a free meditation. I lead you right through it. It's basically a powerful practice that can help calm your nervous system like we talked about help giving you like kind of a soothing balm for any frayed emotions. Reset your heart and mind. Allow you to move forward and tap into some profound connection between your body and your emotions and that physical well-being and your spiritual state kind of like caring for all of it. So wanna encourage you to check that out.



00:31:15.000 --> 00:31:30.140

Erin Jean: not allowing any conflict or any issues to just continue to linger. So. If you want to go over to bitly slash Aaron, Jean meditation. You can find that it's BIT ly



00:31:30.520 --> 00:31:48.680

Erin Jean: Erin, Jean, which is like the jeans ERIN. JEAN. Meditation, and you can grab that free tapping meditation. And you know, just remember, I know there's a lot of mamas listening that self care. It's that vital step



00:31:48.740 --> 00:32:03.729

Erin Jean: towards really having inner peace and harmony, and truly getting to show up as the mom that you want to. And so whatever way that you do that, I want to encourage you to just take time out because you are really worth it



00:32:03.990 --> 00:32:11.519

Tanya: yes, I agree and I will link to that, too, in the show notes, Erin,



00:32:11.580 --> 00:32:16.869

Tanya: And then can you just share before we go how our listeners can find you? As well.



00:32:17.260 --> 00:32:31.149

Erin Jean: yeah. If you head on over to Erin, Jean love LOVE. You can connect with me there. Hear a little bit more of my story



00:32:31.900 --> 00:32:36.159

Erin Jean: and I'd be happy to support you any way that I can on your journey.



00:32:36.870 --> 00:32:59.889

Tanya: Awesome. Thank you so much, Erin, for your time and for sharing your knowledge with our audience and myself, and I just wanna repeat, what my key takeaways are from this conversation. One it, I think the most important thing to note is that it really does only take one person to change, and that's great news, because that puts you in the driver's seat.



00:32:59.940 --> 00:33:18.910

Tanya: And then also some of the practical steps that Erin gave us today is to understand your subconscious mind, she said. You can look up Dr. Joe Dispenza. He has some 3 free content on Youtube. Also, she suggested, working with a coach.



00:33:19.280 --> 00:33:30.120

Tanya: Another key takeaway is, you know, don't expect somebody else to fix it or to save you. Take control. You deserve this.



00:33:30.180 --> 00:33:32.060

Tanya: and you



00:33:32.230 --> 00:34:00.169

Tanya: can fix it, and it just takes a little bit of time and working on yourself. She said, to understand what your body needs when you're in this fight, flight or freeze mode, recognize when you are in that state and find ways that you can calm your nervous system. She suggests that well, she has the tapping that she's that she's offering, which I will link to in the show notes. You can try that.



00:34:00.430 --> 00:34:02.590

Tanya: she said. Not to.



00:34:02.680 --> 00:34:20.329

Tanya: She advise against scrolling on your phone, watching TV, and instead, maybe taking a bubble bath or listening to cast classical music going outside, going for a walk, because when you reset your nervous system, you're gonna be able to



00:34:20.500 --> 00:34:24.809

Tanya: think from that prefrontal cortex. And you're going to make better decisions.



00:34:24.840 --> 00:34:28.280

Tanya:  She also said



00:34:29.139 --> 00:34:35.400

Tanya: to ask yourself what pattern is present here, look for a pattern and recognize the emotion.



00:34:35.580 --> 00:34:40.510

Tanya: And then you're gonna ask yourself, where in childhood did I feel this way?



00:34:40.790 --> 00:34:55.610

Tanya: And lastly, she said, start to help that inner child, and she suggested doing things like journaling with your non-dominant hand, she said. That helps to open the new neural pathways, or even having a conversation



00:34:55.810 --> 00:35:00.650

Tanya: with yourself, and most importantly validating that



00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:04.750

Tanya: inner child and validating your feelings.



00:35:05.080 --> 00:35:06.969

Tanya: So



00:35:07.270 --> 00:35:14.860

Tanya: everyone at home thank you so much for listening. And if you found value in today's show like I did. I ask that you please



00:35:15.060 --> 00:35:38.329

Tanya: share it with a friend. Sharing is caring, and if I could ask a favor if you could. Please take a minute of your time to support the momentum podcast. By subscribing and leaving a rating and review. This helps. More amazing moms find the show until next week. My friends, you're doing so much better than you give yourself credit for, I promise. Keep up the good work. Bye.



00:35:40.010 --> 00:35:42.520

Erin Jean: Yay, awesome.

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