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Getting the Right Help for a Child with Dyslexia
Welcome to another episode of the Mom-entum Podcast, the show dedicated to inspiring, uplifting and empowering women on their journey through motherhood. I'm your host, Tanya Valentine, and in case we haven't been acquainted, allow me to introduce myself!
As a small-town mom of three, I faced a life-threatening miscarriage that sparked a profound spiritual awakening. This experience filled me with immense gratitude for life and prompted me to reevaluate my values, decisions, and place in the world. Inspired by the transformative power of life coaching in my own journey, I pursued certification and launched my own business and podcast. Today, I am dedicated to fulfilling my life’s purpose by helping, guiding, and supporting others while alleviating human suffering.
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So here we are today and I am speaking with my cousin, Leah Barnes, a mom of 5 who is not a stranger to the world of struggle. Today we are discussing the trials and triumphs she has experienced in helping her 12 year old daughter, Ellie, get the best education possible with her diagnosis of dyslexia.
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According to The Yale Center for Dyslexia and Creativity, "dyslexia is an unexpected difficulty in reading for an individual who has the intelligence to be a much better reader. It is most commonly due to a difficulty in phonological processing (the appreciation of the individual sounds of spoken language), which affects an individual’s ability to speak, read, spell, and often, learn a second language. Dyslexia is highly prevalent, affecting 20% of population. Dyslexia represents 80-90 percent of all learning disabilities and differs from the others in its specificity and scientific validation. While those with dyslexia are slow readers, they also, paradoxically, often are very fast and creative thinkers with excellent reasoning skills." (https://dyslexia.yale.edu/resources/parents/school-strategies/the-vocabulary-of-dyslexia-diagnosis-and-treatment/).
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This leads me to my next point I really want to drive home today which is that difficulty reading does not have anything to do with someone’s intelligence. I think that’s as important for the adult and parent to realize and important to instill in your child that just because they have this challenge, difficulty reading, does not mean they are not smart. In fact, there are so many examples of very intelligent, successful people who have thrived despite their dyslexia. People like: Muhammad Ali, Jennifer Aniston, Orlando Bloom, Mel Robbins, Dean Graziosi, Lewis Howes, Erin Brokovich, Cher, Jim Carey , Anderson Cooper, Tom Cruise,Patrick Dempsey, Whoopi Goldberg, Albert Einstein, Agatha Christie, Richard Branson, and Steven Spielberg.
These examples illustrate that dyslexia does not prevent success; many individuals find unique ways to leverage their strengths and develop coping strategies. The broader impact of dyslexia on success is often related to determination, creativity, and resilience.
Tips for Supporting a Child with Dyslexia:
1. Early Intervention:
- Seek evaluation and support as soon as dyslexia is suspected. Early diagnosis and intervention can lead to better outcomes.
Signs your child may have dyslexia include: mispronouncing words and getting things backwards, having a hard time learning nursery rhymes or song lyrics that rhyme, having trouble remembering sequences like singing the letters of the alphabet, telling stories that are hard to follow or having trouble retelling an event in a logical order, having difficulty remembering and following directions with multiple steps, confusing letters that look similar (ex: b,d,p and q) of sound similar (ex: f and v or d and t), having trouble learning letter names and remembering the sounds they make. (https://www.understood.org/en/articles/checklist-signs-of-dyslexia-at-different-ages)
This is not a comprehensive list, and just because your child is experiencing any of these difficulties doesn't necessarily mean they have dyslexia. It is important to have them evaluated by a professional, like a neuropsychiatrist. The first step would be to discuss your concerns with your child's teacher or even their pediatrician.
2. Advocate for Your Child:
- As Leah stresses in this episode, TRUST YOUR GUT and ADVOCATE, ADVOCATE, ADVOCATE!
Work with teachers and school staff to ensure your child receives appropriate accommodations and support, such as extra time on tests and access to specialized reading programs.
Before meeting with your child's teachers it's important to be prepared. Have all school documents relating to your child organized into a binder or file folder. Documents such as:
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report cards
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notes from teachers
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example of child's written work
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relevant graded tests
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results from standardized tests
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health/education assessments
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information provided to you about upcoming meeting
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questions and notes you make in advance of the meeting
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blank paper for you to take notes at the meeting.
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Also, it's important to note, in case you do not work in the educational field, that there may be times during the meeting when members of the educational team will use jargon that you are not familiar with. Don't be afraid to speak up and request they explain things in layman's terms as it's essential for you to be able to properly advocate for your child. (And make this request in a calm, but firm and always respectful demeanor, remembering that you are all on the same team with the same goal in mind: the success of your child).
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You could also, as Leah suggested, request to have an advocate who specializes in supporting parents and children with dyslexia. Leah said she had found her advocate by speaking with other families of children with dyslexia. She recommends finding parents who have been in your shoes. She suggests doing so by either joining a FB support group, or googling dyslexia support groups in your area.
3. Create a Positive Learning Environment:
- Provide a quiet, distraction-free space for homework and reading. Encourage a routine that helps your child feel secure.
4. Encourage Reading:
- Use audiobooks, text-to-speech tools, and engaging materials to foster a love for reading. Make reading a fun and enjoyable activity.
5. Utilize Multisensory Learning:
- Encourage methods that incorporate visual, auditory, and kinesthetic learning styles, such as using manipulatives, drawing, or using apps designed for dyslexic learners.
6. Be Patient and Supportive:
- Understand that learning may take longer for your child. Celebrate small achievements and encourage a growth mindset.
7. Teach Self-Advocacy:
- Help your child understand their learning differences and encourage them to communicate their needs to teachers and peers.
8. Join Support Groups:
- Connect with other parents of children with dyslexia for shared experiences, resources, and emotional support. Again, you can do this by joining a FB support group or even googling dyslexia support groups, or even asking your child's teachers if they know of any.
9. Focus on Strengths:
- Encourage your child to explore their interests and strengths outside of reading. Celebrate their unique talents and abilities.
10. Stay Informed:
- Educate yourself about dyslexia and stay updated on the latest research and strategies to support your child effectively.
Here are some resources that will help you stay informed and provide tools to enhance your child's learning:
1. International Dyslexia Association (IDA):
- Website: dyslexiaida.org
- Offers information on dyslexia, resources for parents, and a directory of professionals.
2. Learning Disabilities Association of America (LDA):
- Website: ldaamerica.org
- Provides resources, articles, and information about dyslexia and other learning disabilities.
3. Understood:
- Website: understood.org
- Offers resources, support, and tools specifically for parents of children with learning differences, including dyslexia.
4. Dyslexia Training Institute:
- Website: dyslexiatraininginstitute.org
- Provides training for parents and educators and resources for supporting children with dyslexia.
5. The Yale Center for Dyslexia & Creativity:
- Website: dyslexia.yale.edu
- Offers information on dyslexia research, diagnosis, and support strategies.
6. Bookshare:
- Website: bookshare.org
- A free online library offering accessible books for students with print disabilities, including dyslexia.
7. Reading Rockets:
- Website: readingrockets.org
- Provides resources on teaching reading and supporting children with dyslexia.
8. Book: Overcoming Dyslexia by Sally Shawywitz
9. Overcoming Dyslexia Workbook for Kids ages 9-12
10. Documentary Film: The Big Picture: Rethinking Dyslexia
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​My friend, if you are struggling trying to help your child learn, if you are worried that they are falling behind, TAKE A DEEP BREATH. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. There is help out there for you! Dive deeper into these resources that we have shared with you today and then go out and find more!
There is so much help out there, all you have to do is ask for it! It is my hope that you got some help today, and at the very least, I hope you leave feeling encouraged and like you can do this, because YOU CAN! You got this Mama! You do!
If you found this episode helpful and you know someone who could benefit from the content shared here today, please be a good friend and share it with them! Let's all work together to make our lives a little easier, a little calmer and more peaceful! In doing so, we are doing our part to make this world a better place!
And be sure to connect with us on IG and FB! Let us know how we can help you! Share your thoughts and takeaways from today's show and tag me @tanyavalentinecoaching and Leah on IG @leahstbarnes or on FB @Leah St. Pierre Barnes
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with Peace and Love,
Tanya
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TRANSCRIPT
Tanya: Hello! Welcome to to the show. Thank you so much for coming on.
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leah: Oh, thank you, and thank you for inviting me on.
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Tanya: Yes, I'm so happy that this all worked out, and I can't wait to just dive right in. So I'm gonna just ask you to start by introducing yourself and giving the audience some background as to what we're going to be talking about today.
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leah: Okay. Hi, I am Leah Barnes, stepmom to 3 boys and an almost 12 year old girl, and another 5 year old boy.
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leah: And today we're going to be talking about dyslexia. Our almost 12 year old daughter. Was diagnosed with dyslexia in.
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leah: It was around
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leah: second grade
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leah: when we officially got a diagnosis.
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Tanya: Okay, yeah. And then.
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Tanya: did you have any suspicions like before she was actually diagnosed that Ellie was dyslexic? And if so, what did you notice.
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leah: So my husband is also dyslexic, so
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leah: that can be hereditary. So I knew that that could be a possibility.
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leah: I did not really think dyslexia was really not on my brain when it came to Ellie, and learning it was I was so focused on
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leah: her. She's a very hyper kid like like the batteries don't run out with her.
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leah: So I knew that we might have like a little add going on. But the dyslexia part never
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leah: really crossed my mind until 1st grade. That's when I started to
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leah: suspect it.
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leah: be
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leah: was a
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leah: They did some sort of testing in 1st grade, and she qualified for a like a title, one reading where she would get pulled out for reading. So in my mind at that point I was just like, Oh, she just needs a little extra help, no big deal right? Because.
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leah: They didn't seem to make it a big deal. And then it was like.
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leah: I think, the oh, I think it was actually
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leah: second
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leah: second grade.
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leah: It was second grade.
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leah: Nope. Sorry
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leah: it was kindergarten.
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leah: You're gonna have to do a lot of editing
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leah: was kindergarten
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leah: that we suspected.
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leah: No, it was kindergarten that she
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leah: was qualified for that title one.
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leah: It was the end of kindergarten that.
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leah: like her teacher, kind of was like, oh, I don't know. I'm kind of noticing this, that and the other thing.
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leah: And I said, Okay, so when do we request testing?
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leah: I knew that much. I knew that it got to the point where we need to
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leah: get some testing for a possible learning disability.
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leah: And she said, and and her teacher said, and this was the end of kindergarten. So the end of the school year. It's not really going to happen. So she said.
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leah: You know, for about the 1st month into 1st grade. See how she does, and then request it. So that's what we did.
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leah: So first.st So I request, I remember, because I was pregnant with Otto.
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leah: So 1st grade I requested testing through the school.
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leah: then we had a meeting. I think it was around March
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leah: of 1st grade, so that would bend 2019
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leah: where we had a meeting, and they noticed some learning disabilities. But they'll never. The district will never call it dyslexia.
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leah: They just, you know, call it some learning disabilities. So.
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Tanya: And I saw you right there.
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leah: Yeah.
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Tanya: Why so? Why is that? Why won't they label it dyslexia.
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leah: Because then they gotta put in more
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leah: services. They won't. They.
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Tanya: Feel bad.
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leah: To be, it needs to be diagnosed by a private neuropsych, which is eventually what we had done.
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Tanya: Okay, okay, which we're gonna get into. But.
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leah: We're gonna get into. Yeah. So they put her. They put her on an Iep that was great. That's what we wanted. We'll get the extra help so fast. Forward. Second grade.
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leah: She's getting the extra help she needs.
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leah: And then I think it was second grade that Covid hit.
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Tanya: Hmm.
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leah: Right? Yeah, yeah.
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leah: So that put
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leah: let's see.
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leah: Second grade.
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leah: She did services.
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leah: She was on an Iep.
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leah: and then
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leah: Covid hit.
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leah: It was around second grade that one of her special Ed teachers said to me, I think I'm noticing some dyslexia tendencies.
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leah: and I remember I actually also work at a a school. I work at a therapeutic day school. So I remember like stepping into an extra, an empty classroom to take this phone call.
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leah: and it was like a light bulb went on when she said, I'm noticing a little bit of dyslexia tendencies I was like, Oh, my God! That's what it is. That's why she's been struggling even with these services. That's why she.
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leah: you know. Well, one. She had trouble sitting still to go through reading a book to her
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leah: but even sitting down to practice, or any little I mean, you know, 1st grade, they're not getting tons of homework. They're getting little snippets of homework.
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leah: It was always a fight, always, always, always, always. And I would get so frustrated because I'm like we need to get this done. I'm trying to teach her. Homework's important. But then the poor kid is, or her her brains. It's not learning like the rest of us. It learns differently.
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leah: So when her that special, Ed teacher said, I'm seeing signs of dyslexia, I was like, oh, my goodness, that's what it is!
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Tanya: So what?
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leah: New, and my God.
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Tanya: Yeah. So what are those signs
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Tanya: do exactly like? Is, it?
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Tanya: Is a part of it like you said she had a hard time like sitting still when you were reading.
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leah: That was, that was a part of it.
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leah: just, you know, getting some things backwards or confusing letters.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: It was just those little things that
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leah: that I I did notice, but I don't think it like the light bulb didn't go on in my head until one of our special Ed teachers said, I'm seeing signs of dyslexia. I think it's time to get a
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leah: but you know they're not supposed to tell you what to like.
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leah: For some reason.
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leah: you know the districts.
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leah: Actually, you need to edit that. Don't don't put that in
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Tanya: Don't put that in that. They're not supposed to tell you.
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leah: Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah.
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Tanya: Okay, yeah. Let me write a note.
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leah: Okay. Oh, well.
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Tanya: I'll I'll listen back, and I'll hear it.
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leah: Okay? So I said, okay, I said, now it's time for a private neuro psych to get that official diagnosis. So then Covid hits end of second grade or mid? Was it Mar March of her second grade year?
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leah: So by the time it's a very hard, there's a very long list to have private neuropsychs done.
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leah: So I got a few recommendations. Actually, from
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leah: a friend.
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leah: a friend of John's who's went through this with their son.
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leah: I called this woman, and she was able to
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leah: get Ellie in for testing. So it was this
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leah: summer.
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leah: It was the summer right before she started 3rd grade.
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leah: Unfortunately the testing was done over zoom, so there was like one part of it that they couldn't, that the woman couldn't do, which, you know it is what it is. By the time I got her private report there, it, said
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leah: Allywood.
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leah: You know Adhc. Was her diagnosis and dyslexia.
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leah: so I wasn't surprised at either.
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leah: and
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leah: so and.
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Tanya: Question.
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leah: Yeah, yeah, definitely.
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Tanya: Common for that. Those to go hand in hand.
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leah: Yes, it is.
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Tanya: I thought.
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leah: Yes. Yeah.
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Tanya: Alright!
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leah: I mean, it's not like a
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leah: you know. It's not like a guarantee, but it does. They do go hand in hand.
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Tanya: I thought, okay.
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Tanya: sorry. Go on.
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leah: But not necessarily all the time.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: If that makes sense.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: So let's see. So.
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leah: and in her report she wrote in that she would benefit from a school specializing in dyslexia.
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leah: so
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leah: that prompted us to. Research. Some schools
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leah: apply to some schools, not knowing what was going to. You know what the future would hold.
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leah: We continued on our Iep
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leah: up some services.
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leah: let's see.
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leah: I'm trying to just go through the whole
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leah: timeline of everything.
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leah: So
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leah: we did. Yes, so the end of 3rd grade.
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leah: We did an application to a school that specializes in dyslexia
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leah: just to see what would happen. And just to get, you know, open that up. We also decided to hire an advocate because we knew that we're going to
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leah: have a fight on our hands to get her
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leah: more services and help that we felt the district would be able to offer and do
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leah: so.
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leah: Basically
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leah: at the end of 3rd grade the district
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leah: suggested their recommendation was for her to attend
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leah: the district's language based learning disability program.
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leah: And so you'll hear me say, Lbld, that's like the specialized language based program. But unfortunately it was housed at a different elementary school
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leah: so she had to switch schools starting 4th grade, which was tough in itself.
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Tanya: Huh!
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leah: He or she has a dyslexic diagnosis which
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leah: you know we're like. Now we know, Ellie, like we know why you're struggling so much.
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leah: you know, that can make you feel better. That we have an answer, and we can fight for for getting you more help that you need to learn to your best ability, right?
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Tanya: Have.
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leah: So like, I said. My husband has dyslexia e back, you know. 40 something years ago
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leah: his parents went through the same thing of fighting, you know, fighting the district to get the services that he needed, and he ended up going to a school that specialized in dyslexia and met his bestest friend ever who is actually Ellie's godfather. So when we got that diagnosis, you know, we called.
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leah: we called her uncle
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leah: and talked about having dyslexia diagnosis and having to switch schools.
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leah: and we'll never forget there were lots of tears. I'm gonna try not to cry. Oh.
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leah: Because, he told her.
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leah: and this sticks with her even now.
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leah: that
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leah: she has a superpower, and it's
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leah: called dyslexia.
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leah: and she will even tell you that to this day. It's funny. Before we got on this call I got this piece of paper out piece of paper out, and it's sitting next to me, and it's something she did at school.
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leah: and we have it. And we actually photocopied it and framed it for her Uncle Steve, because he lives down in Florida.
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leah: and he has it hanging in his house. And it says I am special because
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leah: and she writes, I am special, because I have a superpower called dyslexia.
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leah: So she rolls with that.
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leah: And it's so true, you know, we all have our superpower right.
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leah: We all talk about having a super power. But if you put it
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leah: like that, she's like, Yeah.
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leah: I have a superpower. It's dyslexia. Whatever my brain works, learns differently, like.
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leah: let's move on.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: So, 4th and 5, th
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leah: yeah, 4.th
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Tanya: And I.
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leah: Sorry.
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Tanya: Go ahead!
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leah: Sorry.
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Tanya: No go ahead!
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leah: So 4th and 5th grade. She was at this a different elementary school in our town
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leah: and attended the language based program. So she would be in a Gen. Ed, a general education classroom, and then go into her language based classroom for extra help. Or the teacher would go into the Gen. Ed class
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leah: to support her. And some fellow students that
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leah: had a similar diagnosis with dyslexia.
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leah: yeah, so, and then fast forward. It just it wasn't enough, and we needed more. So we for middle school. She started at
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leah: she wasn't making enough the enough progress. She wasn't what they call our our advocate. Always, whenever we go into meetings, our advocate would come or and I should mention
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leah: our advocate. We found through a friend who also used this advocate who is in a similar situation as us.
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leah: So we ended up hiring this woman. She was great.
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leah: But she'd always say we need to. You know her. Each year her gaps would widen.
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leah: An advocate would always go into the meeting and say, What are we going to do to close these gaps to get this kid
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leah: closer to her grade level.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: So you know, that's always been the that's always been the issue. And the fight is, what are we gonna do to get her to close these gaps and get her remediated. So we felt that
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leah: We needed to make a change. We couldn't have her stay in district.
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leah: because the
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leah: in our mind
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leah: and our hearts and our gut
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leah: the gaps
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leah: we're not
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leah: they. They felt like they were just widening. They weren't closing and getting her caught up so.
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Tanya: What is this like reading language.
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leah: Read it.
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Tanya: We had to.
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leah: Yes, all of that. Yeah.
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leah: So
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leah: we. She is now enrolled in a private school.
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leah: That specializes in learning disabilities. But specifically dyslexia
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leah: and I gotta tell you 6th grade
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leah: you know she's we're in between. She's going into 7, th you know, in a few weeks, when school's back in session. But I gotta tell you. 6th grade was a game changer.
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leah: was.
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Tanya: That.
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leah: Because it is.
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Tanya: This was her 1st year at that.
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leah: 1st year at this new private school.
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leah: And it wasn't easy. I mean, there's a lot of blood, sweat, and tears to get where we are.
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leah: and
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leah: it. It was a total game changer, and we we made the absolute right decision for her, her.
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leah: even her, even this school, just her confidence level alone. Never mind getting like
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leah: we're we're closing those gaps that I talked about.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: Her confidence level alone. She's in a school that
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leah: that all the kids learn like her. So I think there's a a level of her being able to relax.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: And know that.
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leah: Oh, all these kids learn like me. Okay, I'm not going to be pulled. Yeah, she gets pulled out for certain things. But all the kids do.
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Tanya: Right, right.
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leah: Probably the confidence level comes with that from that.
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leah: And
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leah: and and just knowing that okay, like everyone here is like me, they learn like me.
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Tanya: Just feeling. I bet you feel that belonging right.
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leah: That? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. Yup.
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leah: yeah. So
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leah: yeah, it's been a long road.
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Tanya: Oh, my gosh!
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Tanya: Well, I'm so glad you got her in this school. And can you talk more about like what the process has been like of getting her the help that she needs you kinda went into it a little bit. But if you could go like until just like.
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leah: So I will say.
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Tanya: For the people out there who
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Tanya: are trying to find help for their kids.
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leah: The well, I what I'm gonna say is.
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leah: get friendly with
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leah: the teachers.
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leah: the special Ed. There's so there's only so much that they can tell you to do, and not to do so. If you ask these questions and open it up
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leah: and say like, Hey, do you think you know I should look into testing
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leah: you should go with your gut.
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leah: That's always, you know, as a mom with anything or and as a parent with anything raising kids always go with your gut right.
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Tanya: So.
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leah: If you're suspecting that your kid is struggling, maybe too much, or
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leah: or whatever. Just go with your gut. Ask the teacher. Okay, how do I ask your teacher what? What are the next steps to have my child tested in the district?
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leah: More than likely you have to put it in into an official request, like a letter to the school. To.
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leah: You'd have to ask specifically, I think, when I did it. God! It feels so long ago. I think the letter was direct
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leah: address to like her teacher, and maybe the principal of the school, I think.
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leah: But you just have to ask the questions, and then it's a process. You just gotta be patient. And I know it's hard, because.
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leah: you know, you don't want your kid to get so far behind. So you're like, it needs to be done now. Right?
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leah: but it's it's you just gotta breathe and just
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leah: go through it, and you'll get through it and lean on
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leah: other people that have been through it. We've been lucky enough. This might go into one of your other questions. Tanya.
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leah: you know, talking to other parents who have been through this.
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leah: Those have been, I think, our our
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leah: our biggest resources. I feel like.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: Our friends and and even family in the community, or outside of the community who have been through through this. I also became.
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leah: There's a lot of Facebook book groups that I
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leah: I'm
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leah: I belong to one. And and here we are in Massachusetts, in Boston. So look in your area on your Facebook groups, Google, you know, dyslexia support groups or
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leah: whatnot, and those those have been a good resource. Also.
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leah: yeah.
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Tanya: That was one of my my next question actually.
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leah: Okay. Both.
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Tanya: I jumped the gun so.
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leah: Sorry.
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Tanya: No fa, no Facebook groups, Google dyslexia support groups. That's great. And then
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Tanya: that kind of leads me into another question, which is because you've been mentioning about an getting an advocate.
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Tanya: So where does somebody
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Tanya: go to?
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leah: So you could. So so in our case, like I said, it was
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leah: through friends who have been through similar
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leah: scenario.
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leah: So we were lucky enough in that aspect. But if you
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leah: ask around
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leah: other parents.
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leah: if you Google in your state, you know advocates, there's you should find a list. It's they're out there.
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Tanya: But what is what?
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leah: Yeah.
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Tanya: What would somebody Google like advocate for dyslexic child.
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leah: Sure, or learning disabilities.
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Tanya: Or learning disabilities.
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leah: And you and you just pop in your state and and your or your air, your town state.
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leah: and a city and you should be able to
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leah: to find someone. Call me.
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Tanya: So what exactly does the advocate do?
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leah: So again, an advocate can be. This is can be expensive. It's been out of pocket. I I don't even want to go into how much money we have.
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Tanya: Is it always out of pocket.
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leah: So it it I
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leah: I think that
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leah: in each State I know in Massachusetts I I believe
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leah: there are some
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leah: that may be able to help you. I wouldn't say pro bono, but
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leah: it I mean, it's so hard to tell but typically I think it is pretty much out of pocket.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: Yeah.
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Tanya: So it can get expensive.
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leah: Can.
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Tanya: But okay.
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Tanya: so what exactly does the advocate do, though?
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leah: So the Advocate has
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leah: reviewed Ieps
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leah: review.
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Tanya: Real quick in case somebody doesn't know what Iep is.
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leah: Sorry. Yes, it.
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Tanya: Okay.
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Tanya: It's.
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leah: And individualized educational plan.
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leah: Okay, so it's individual to your child and what your child needs.
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Tanya: Okay.
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Tanya: So the advocate.
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leah: So the Advocate has.
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leah: Let's see, she has reviewed Ieps. She has reviewed our private neuro sites that we've had done.
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leah: That testing
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leah: that I talked about where we got her official diagnosis.
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Tanya: Yeah.
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leah: And we've actually had 2 private neuropsychs done
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leah: since
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leah: 3rd grade
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leah: mainly. We got the second one done because there was a
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leah: like. I said
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leah: her 1st one was done over zoom because it was lovely Covid that messed everything up right
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leah: And so like the the school that we initially had a put an application in. They wanted us to do another neuropsych, because there was that piece that couldn't be done over Zoom, which I actually agreed with and was okay with. But we
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leah: we waited a little bit because you don't want to have them. I don't think you want to have them done too close together. So
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leah: we had another one done when she was in
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leah: 5th grade. I think it was 5th grade.
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leah: so there was like about 2 years in between, I believe.
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leah: Give or take
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leah: So the second one we had done was done in person. So our advocate reviewed those our advocate
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leah: came to Iep meetings with us.
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leah: and just kind of steered us in the right direction of what we want, what we don't want, what's going to benefit our child.
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leah: you know, because it costs the district's money when
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leah: when the kid needs services. But again, like, if they need services, they need services. You want them to learn at their best ability, right?
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leah: So yeah, so that's what our advocate did. And basically, when it got to the point where our fight became a little bit
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leah: bigger we then were referred to an attorney.
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leah: and that was a kind of a finding. An attorney was a combination of
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leah: recommendations from our advocate, and also again talking to some friends who have been through this before.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: So now we have an attorney to help us
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leah: navigate.
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leah: You know
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leah: her
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leah: the school.
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leah: and working with the district.
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Tanya: Okay.
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leah: Yeah. So it's been a long road, a really long road.
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leah: but it's you know you do what you need to do
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leah: for your child so they can get the best education possible. Right?
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Tanya: Yeah, absolutely.
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leah: Or anything in that matter, even when it comes to like medical. You're all you fight for your kid.
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Tanya: Absolutely.
357
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leah: Yeah.
358
00:26:31.400 --> 00:26:40.009
Tanya: So it sounds like the advocate is just there, kind of like as your support person like guiding you. They have a little bit more
359
00:26:40.070 --> 00:26:42.580
Tanya: a lot more background.
360
00:26:42.920 --> 00:26:43.980
leah: Definitely.
361
00:26:44.490 --> 00:26:50.759
Tanya: And more information, and just can tell you what the next steps are, and just kind of.
362
00:26:50.990 --> 00:26:52.820
leah: Yeah, they're there to guide you.
363
00:26:53.180 --> 00:26:53.900
Tanya: Okay.
364
00:26:54.410 --> 00:26:58.169
leah: You know, if they if and again, if they think you know.
365
00:26:58.570 --> 00:27:08.639
leah: maybe there, maybe your child is only getting X amount of minutes in one. On one reading, the Advocate will say, Well, that's not enough. We need to push for more.
366
00:27:09.110 --> 00:27:10.220
Tanya: Okay.
367
00:27:10.390 --> 00:27:16.930
leah: So because parents, some parents, if you're not in in education, if you're not in the field, you're not gonna know.
368
00:27:16.930 --> 00:27:27.569
Tanya: You don't know that's the thing. And then you just trust this kind of like authority person who would be like the teacher right? That they know what they're doing.
369
00:27:27.580 --> 00:27:31.629
Tanya: Yeah, which not to say that they don't know what they're doing. But it's just like
370
00:27:31.950 --> 00:27:40.350
Tanya: you're fighting for what's best for your child, and it's not like it's not good versus bad. I'm not like, we're not saying that the teachers.
371
00:27:40.350 --> 00:27:40.710
leah: Now.
372
00:27:40.710 --> 00:27:43.719
Tanya: Bad. It's just like, Hey, let's
373
00:27:43.800 --> 00:27:46.409
Tanya: come together as a team.
374
00:27:46.410 --> 00:27:47.439
leah: Exactly and exactly.
375
00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:50.950
Tanya: Figure out what we can, how we can
376
00:27:51.270 --> 00:27:53.870
Tanya: help my child learn and succeed
377
00:27:54.840 --> 00:27:55.360
Tanya: right.
378
00:27:55.360 --> 00:27:57.310
leah: Yes, exactly.
379
00:27:57.900 --> 00:28:00.490
leah: you know, and the teacher can only say so much.
380
00:28:00.740 --> 00:28:02.070
Tanya: Right, yeah.
381
00:28:02.360 --> 00:28:04.140
leah: So, yeah.
382
00:28:07.490 --> 00:28:15.689
Tanya: So my next question was, and you've kind of gotten into it. But are there any resources that you have found helpful like? Not just like
383
00:28:15.750 --> 00:28:20.142
Tanya: support people, but like, maybe I don't know if you have any
384
00:28:22.190 --> 00:28:29.033
Tanya: like I don't know like websites, or like books or activities, or like, for instance,
385
00:28:30.590 --> 00:28:32.600
Tanya: or like apps like
386
00:28:32.640 --> 00:28:38.089
Tanya: I have ABC. Mouse for my kids, who are a lot younger, and not that that's like
387
00:28:38.330 --> 00:28:42.350
Tanya: specific for dyslexia. But you you know what I mean, like something like that.
388
00:28:45.990 --> 00:28:47.610
Tanya: Is there anything I don't know.
389
00:28:47.820 --> 00:28:49.970
leah: No, I feel like, you know.
390
00:28:50.400 --> 00:28:54.130
leah: with me and our situation. I
391
00:28:54.740 --> 00:29:04.330
leah: we really I have a friend. I have a lot of friends who are in this situation. One friend going through it like
392
00:29:04.490 --> 00:29:13.147
leah: same. We're like on the same page. It's so funny so we bounce things off of each other.
393
00:29:13.840 --> 00:29:22.669
leah: The friend of my husband, who we initially got the name of the advocate that we used. We bounced things off of them
394
00:29:23.744 --> 00:29:26.229
leah: but again like like.
395
00:29:26.230 --> 00:29:28.430
Tanya: Books, too. Are there any books?
396
00:29:28.430 --> 00:29:33.589
leah: I can't think of any off the top of my head. There are. You need to help your kid, or you.
397
00:29:35.430 --> 00:29:37.100
leah: I mean, I mean there are both.
398
00:29:38.218 --> 00:29:40.509
leah: I never really researched any
399
00:29:40.920 --> 00:29:43.529
leah: or or read any, because I
400
00:29:44.110 --> 00:29:47.230
leah: kind of was in this. I'm sorry Ellie's.
401
00:29:48.690 --> 00:29:49.219
Tanya: Your question.
402
00:29:49.220 --> 00:29:50.360
leah: Don't. Okay.
403
00:29:51.080 --> 00:29:52.530
Tanya: I can't hear.
404
00:29:52.530 --> 00:29:56.879
leah: Ellie likes to use typing.typing.com. She wanted me to tell you.
405
00:29:56.880 --> 00:30:01.680
Tanya: Oh, thank you, Ellie. Okay, so what is so typing.com.
406
00:30:02.040 --> 00:30:02.700
leah: Yeah.
407
00:30:05.030 --> 00:30:06.449
Tanya: And do you know what that is?
408
00:30:07.510 --> 00:30:10.840
leah: It's just like an app to help them type.
409
00:30:10.840 --> 00:30:11.300
Tanya: It helps.
410
00:30:11.300 --> 00:30:15.910
leah: But I think it's it's through your school right? It's no, it's a separate
leah: oh, I guess it's separate typing.com. I know that she used it, and she used it in school a lot.
412
00:30:21.670 --> 00:30:23.710
Tanya: Okay. And it was to help her tight.
413
00:30:24.410 --> 00:30:25.040
leah: Yeah.
414
00:30:25.320 --> 00:30:26.370
leah: okay.
415
00:30:26.960 --> 00:30:29.000
leah: so because, yeah.
416
00:30:29.190 --> 00:30:30.080
leah: yeah.
417
00:30:31.690 --> 00:30:32.590
Tanya: Awesome.
418
00:30:33.200 --> 00:30:38.810
Tanya: Yeah, right? So we got piping.com. And then, it sounds like you're just kind of.
419
00:30:39.530 --> 00:30:40.280
leah: That's from.
420
00:30:40.280 --> 00:30:40.720
Tanya: I don't.
421
00:30:40.720 --> 00:30:41.959
leah: I think.com.
422
00:30:42.650 --> 00:30:44.929
leah: I really relied on on.
423
00:30:44.960 --> 00:30:57.010
leah: on friends, and I have a lot of friends like in special education or in education in general. So I was lucky enough to, you know, bounce things off of them.
424
00:30:57.660 --> 00:30:58.590
Tanya: Okay.
425
00:30:58.900 --> 00:30:59.850
Tanya: Awesome.
426
00:30:59.850 --> 00:31:02.829
leah: But again, Google is your friend, right?
427
00:31:02.830 --> 00:31:05.900
Tanya: I agree. Both our friends everywhere, anything.
428
00:31:06.190 --> 00:31:07.490
leah: And
429
00:31:08.800 --> 00:31:11.240
leah: word of mouth! Friends
430
00:31:12.080 --> 00:31:13.370
leah: become
431
00:31:13.390 --> 00:31:14.570
leah: close with
432
00:31:14.750 --> 00:31:17.716
leah: your kids. Special education, teachers.
433
00:31:18.310 --> 00:31:19.480
Tanya: Yeah, they always.
434
00:31:19.480 --> 00:31:21.919
leah: Have great ideas, you know, to help.
435
00:31:23.570 --> 00:31:26.209
leah: and I was, I was always told, you know.
436
00:31:26.360 --> 00:31:31.759
leah: read, read, read to her, which I would, but then it would get difficult, because she couldn't sit still.
437
00:31:31.940 --> 00:31:32.770
Tanya: Yeah.
438
00:31:32.770 --> 00:31:33.850
leah: So
439
00:31:33.870 --> 00:31:40.380
leah: we would. I would really focus on reading at night, and not so much during the day. Because then, you know, you're getting
440
00:31:41.290 --> 00:31:50.440
leah: I I felt myself getting like so frustrated like, just sit still for this book. We have to do this like if it's like part of our homework log or something simple, you know.
441
00:31:50.440 --> 00:31:51.080
Tanya: And just wouldn't.
442
00:31:51.080 --> 00:31:55.280
leah: Do it, and I would get frustrated. Then she would get frustrated. And you know how that goes.
443
00:31:55.280 --> 00:31:57.860
Tanya: And then that just makes it worse, because then it's.
444
00:31:57.860 --> 00:31:58.620
leah: Yeah, you're trying.
445
00:31:58.620 --> 00:32:07.010
Tanya: Trying to do it like with clenched teeth, and I feel like the energy it's just not conducive to
446
00:32:07.340 --> 00:32:09.629
Tanya: learning. So I got.
447
00:32:09.630 --> 00:32:14.559
leah: To the point where I was like, you know what we're just gonna read at bedtime. And I'm not gonna worry about.
448
00:32:15.530 --> 00:32:18.240
Tanya: Yeah, because I mean, if it's a fight, then.
449
00:32:18.240 --> 00:32:19.499
leah: It's it's not worth it.
450
00:32:19.500 --> 00:32:21.940
Tanya: It's not gonna go anywhere.
451
00:32:21.940 --> 00:32:22.949
leah: No, it's not going to end. Well.
452
00:32:22.950 --> 00:32:23.450
Tanya: So.
453
00:32:23.450 --> 00:32:23.780
leah: Right.
454
00:32:23.780 --> 00:32:25.540
Tanya: Yeah, like, how? So just
455
00:32:25.680 --> 00:32:28.080
Tanya: I guess for these people.
456
00:32:28.360 --> 00:32:28.760
leah: Yeah.
457
00:32:28.760 --> 00:32:30.649
Tanya: His parents at home like
458
00:32:30.990 --> 00:32:38.349
Tanya: try and find ways to make it fun, or just become like a detective and
459
00:32:39.087 --> 00:32:45.290
Tanya: figure out the best time of day for your kid cause. It is so individual, right.
460
00:32:45.290 --> 00:32:46.369
leah: It is. Yeah.
461
00:32:46.370 --> 00:32:51.370
Tanya: Is there? It's just like for anyone adults without
462
00:32:51.380 --> 00:32:55.009
Tanya: learning disabilities included in this, like myself, like
463
00:32:55.370 --> 00:33:05.469
Tanya: I have to figure out. When when do I do my work like my research and my writing. When is it best for me at night? Forget you can just forget it.
464
00:33:05.470 --> 00:33:06.680
leah: Oh, exactly!
465
00:33:06.680 --> 00:33:07.550
Tanya: No.
466
00:33:07.550 --> 00:33:08.010
leah: Your Friday.
467
00:33:08.010 --> 00:33:08.340
Tanya: You just.
468
00:33:08.340 --> 00:33:10.169
leah: End of the night as a mom.
469
00:33:10.170 --> 00:33:11.060
Tanya: Right. I'm.
470
00:33:11.060 --> 00:33:11.860
leah: Got it.
471
00:33:11.860 --> 00:33:14.300
Tanya: I can't like. There's no learning. I can't.
472
00:33:14.300 --> 00:33:16.739
leah: There's no gas left in the tank.
473
00:33:16.740 --> 00:33:24.110
Tanya: No, so, but the same for your kid like, try and become like a detective and figure out, okay, when is there
474
00:33:24.340 --> 00:33:29.969
Tanya: energy vest throughout the day, although. I say that. And I'm thinking.
475
00:33:30.230 --> 00:33:31.589
Tanya: trying to think of
476
00:33:32.310 --> 00:33:43.829
Tanya: people who might be listening to this at home. And they're probably like, well, when do I even find the time? Because my school during the day? And then they have after school activities, and we have to rush home
477
00:33:43.970 --> 00:33:48.340
Tanya: either before or after the activities to eat dinner, and then it's
478
00:33:48.939 --> 00:33:52.830
Tanya: or not to eat dinner, to to homework and and.
479
00:33:52.830 --> 00:33:53.590
leah: All that stuff.
480
00:33:53.590 --> 00:33:58.760
Tanya: Somewhere and then do the bedtime routine, and then it's time for bed. And then it's the next day.
481
00:33:58.860 --> 00:33:59.480
Tanya: Yeah,
482
00:34:00.910 --> 00:34:04.049
Tanya: so yeah, what advice would you have
483
00:34:07.120 --> 00:34:11.600
Tanya: of like finding like? How do you is? Are there ways? Where
484
00:34:11.940 --> 00:34:14.210
Tanya: are there things that you do to make it
485
00:34:15.500 --> 00:34:22.109
Tanya: to try and make it more fun, or at least like more enjoyable and less like. Oh, we have to do this like
486
00:34:22.880 --> 00:34:27.630
Tanya: where that breeds like resistance from her, you know.
487
00:34:28.999 --> 00:34:35.789
leah: as far as okay. So here's here's a great example. I think if this, I think this is what we're getting at.
488
00:34:35.799 --> 00:34:37.099
leah: So
489
00:34:38.589 --> 00:34:45.629
leah: with her new at her new school that she's come she's completed one year at. And I said, like I said, it's been a game changer.
490
00:34:46.148 --> 00:34:53.119
leah: You know in years past it was like, if there was homework, it was always a struggle and a fight, and I would just say.
491
00:34:53.120 --> 00:34:53.620
Tanya: Yeah.
492
00:34:53.620 --> 00:34:54.449
leah: Forget it.
493
00:34:54.670 --> 00:34:55.380
leah: forget it.
494
00:34:55.389 --> 00:34:56.269
Tanya: Worth it? Yeah.
495
00:34:56.270 --> 00:34:58.280
leah: Can't. It's not worth it.
496
00:34:58.400 --> 00:35:00.410
leah: I have nothing left in me.
497
00:35:00.570 --> 00:35:03.769
leah: I'm going to read you a book at bedtime. We're calling it a day.
498
00:35:04.060 --> 00:35:04.770
Tanya: Yeah.
499
00:35:05.130 --> 00:35:06.260
leah: So
500
00:35:06.770 --> 00:35:10.750
leah: at her new school this past year. I love that they do this.
501
00:35:12.410 --> 00:35:16.339
leah: They well, 1st of all, her confidence level has
502
00:35:17.380 --> 00:35:22.789
leah: made such a difference. And I think that helps play into what I'm gonna
503
00:35:22.910 --> 00:35:25.077
leah: tell you. Okay,
504
00:35:25.710 --> 00:35:28.990
leah: So she comes home with homework at her new school.
505
00:35:29.820 --> 00:35:34.060
leah: and it's very, very manageable.
506
00:35:34.720 --> 00:35:36.539
leah: I think they're so
507
00:35:36.580 --> 00:35:39.440
leah: much put on these kids
508
00:35:40.540 --> 00:35:43.610
leah: that's not always so manageable.
509
00:35:43.830 --> 00:35:44.740
Tanya: Yeah.
510
00:35:44.920 --> 00:35:55.270
leah: And they, you know, I had a conference with her teachers at the beginning of the year. How is she doing and adjusting? You know those typical meetings, right.
511
00:35:55.270 --> 00:35:56.020
Tanya: Yeah.
512
00:35:56.860 --> 00:36:00.209
leah: And every teacher at this school said.
513
00:36:00.320 --> 00:36:02.240
leah: if her homework
514
00:36:02.380 --> 00:36:03.640
leah: takes her
515
00:36:03.850 --> 00:36:05.989
leah: more than 20 min.
516
00:36:06.380 --> 00:36:07.520
leah: stop.
517
00:36:08.420 --> 00:36:10.199
leah: stop at 20 min.
518
00:36:11.480 --> 00:36:13.439
leah: If she's struggling
519
00:36:13.570 --> 00:36:17.269
leah: with XY and Z. On a particular homework assignment.
520
00:36:19.090 --> 00:36:20.170
leah: She just
521
00:36:20.240 --> 00:36:21.939
leah: emails the teacher.
522
00:36:22.730 --> 00:36:23.790
leah: or
523
00:36:23.970 --> 00:36:27.529
leah: the next day they have what
524
00:36:27.590 --> 00:36:35.910
leah: he always says. It's called homework flex. So instead of going to like a recess.
525
00:36:36.740 --> 00:36:41.909
leah: they have the chance to go to this, what they call homework flex with a teacher
526
00:36:42.030 --> 00:36:47.090
leah: and get that extra support because a lot of the kids going to her school
527
00:36:47.250 --> 00:36:48.530
leah: gravel
528
00:36:48.970 --> 00:36:55.199
leah: they're all commuting. So it's not easy for them to just stay after school for extra help.
529
00:36:55.200 --> 00:36:56.200
Tanya: Yeah.
530
00:36:56.490 --> 00:36:57.790
leah: They all have a commute.
531
00:36:58.710 --> 00:37:12.200
leah: So they offer. They offer this homework flex. So she's struggling, or she's stuck on something, and maybe I can't help her, or she doesn't want my. Sometimes she doesn't want my help. Sometimes it's easier to help
532
00:37:13.460 --> 00:37:22.500
leah: another. You know, she's she's finding that, you know. Maybe another adult explains something better than I do, or her father does.
533
00:37:22.510 --> 00:37:35.390
leah: so she'll just say, no. I'm just gonna I'll just go to homework flex. But I love the fact that the school is like, if the homework is taking her, you know, 20 min and stop if it's not done, don't worry about it.
534
00:37:35.630 --> 00:37:36.749
Tanya: Yeah, I love that.
535
00:37:38.020 --> 00:37:38.360
leah: So.
536
00:37:38.360 --> 00:37:40.020
Tanya: It takes the stress
537
00:37:40.240 --> 00:37:43.840
Tanya: not only off the kid, but off the parent as well.
538
00:37:43.840 --> 00:37:44.910
leah: Exactly that.
539
00:37:44.910 --> 00:37:47.540
Tanya: Because if and then, if you're stressed.
540
00:37:47.710 --> 00:37:50.059
Tanya: she feels it. And it's just.
541
00:37:50.060 --> 00:37:50.530
leah: Please.
542
00:37:50.530 --> 00:37:51.760
Tanya: Pounding.
543
00:37:52.320 --> 00:37:55.819
Tanya: the frustration and the stress. And it. That is not
544
00:37:55.930 --> 00:37:56.729
Tanya: I can do things.
545
00:37:56.730 --> 00:37:57.310
leah: Exactly.
546
00:37:57.310 --> 00:37:58.890
Tanya: Use of learning, environment.
547
00:37:59.150 --> 00:38:01.679
leah: No, it doesn't benefit anybody.
548
00:38:01.810 --> 00:38:16.040
Tanya: No, yeah. And actually on the subject. Now that we're on the subject of homework just real quick, I mean my friend Alison, who works in the educational department, and you know her. She told me that back home, so I'm in Indiana.
549
00:38:16.140 --> 00:38:17.640
Tanya: Leah is.
550
00:38:17.640 --> 00:38:18.170
leah: Yeah.
551
00:38:18.170 --> 00:38:23.459
Tanya: In Massachusetts. So the in Massachusetts, in the area where my friend
552
00:38:23.470 --> 00:38:26.980
Tanya: works for the educational department in
553
00:38:27.140 --> 00:38:30.099
Tanya: their elementary school. They don't even do homework anymore.
554
00:38:30.420 --> 00:38:31.040
leah: Yeah.
555
00:38:31.830 --> 00:38:32.500
Tanya: Which.
556
00:38:33.610 --> 00:38:35.650
leah: I think they want you to do.
557
00:38:35.660 --> 00:38:38.499
leah: I think they want you to read, or something.
558
00:38:38.500 --> 00:38:41.720
Tanya: Okay, that's fine. But like the homework part of it.
559
00:38:41.720 --> 00:38:44.060
leah: Yeah, and until they get but wait.
560
00:38:44.060 --> 00:38:45.580
Tanya: And I like that.
561
00:38:45.580 --> 00:38:48.659
leah: That's elementary, though, once they get into middle school.
562
00:38:48.660 --> 00:38:50.680
Tanya: It's just elementary, but still.
563
00:38:50.680 --> 00:38:51.749
leah: Yeah, you've got to think.
564
00:38:52.240 --> 00:38:58.019
Tanya: These kids are going to school from? I don't know what time does school start there? Is it? 8 am. To like 2, 30.
565
00:38:58.369 --> 00:39:02.210
leah: I think 8 30 to 2, 30. Something along those lines.
566
00:39:02.400 --> 00:39:13.150
Tanya: Okay. So they're doing that all day. They're doing this work. It's like a job. And then a lot of them have after school activities. And and you know, as a parent
567
00:39:13.310 --> 00:39:14.000
Tanya: like
568
00:39:14.920 --> 00:39:16.680
Tanya: like, when do they get a break.
569
00:39:16.880 --> 00:39:18.040
leah: Exactly.
570
00:39:19.450 --> 00:39:20.300
leah: exactly.
571
00:39:21.870 --> 00:39:22.490
leah: Yeah.
572
00:39:24.020 --> 00:39:26.430
leah: So I love that this school they
573
00:39:26.470 --> 00:39:29.760
leah: and the other thing they do is it's only
574
00:39:30.630 --> 00:39:33.119
leah: what does she do? 2 subjects a night.
575
00:39:34.310 --> 00:39:37.900
leah: so let's say, Mondays and Wednesdays might be
576
00:39:38.480 --> 00:39:40.790
leah: math, and English.
577
00:39:41.030 --> 00:39:46.699
leah: Tuesday and Thursdays might be like a science and a social studies type class.
578
00:39:49.230 --> 00:39:49.990
Tanya: Okay.
579
00:39:50.250 --> 00:39:54.060
leah: So it's not all 4 subjects every night.
580
00:39:54.330 --> 00:39:55.040
Tanya: Yeah.
581
00:39:55.040 --> 00:39:55.950
leah: They split it up.
582
00:39:55.950 --> 00:39:57.390
Tanya: Overwhelming.
583
00:39:57.390 --> 00:39:58.260
leah: Yes.
584
00:39:58.260 --> 00:40:00.037
Tanya: Somebody with intensive
585
00:40:01.080 --> 00:40:02.350
Tanya: with, add.
586
00:40:02.500 --> 00:40:04.499
leah: Yeah, yeah.
587
00:40:04.500 --> 00:40:06.639
Tanya: Attention. Deficit disorder. Yeah, or.
588
00:40:06.640 --> 00:40:09.439
leah: Any child with any type of learning, disability.
589
00:40:09.440 --> 00:40:10.040
Tanya: Yeah.
590
00:40:10.040 --> 00:40:10.730
leah: You know.
591
00:40:10.730 --> 00:40:12.199
Tanya: Overwhelming. Yeah, so that's.
592
00:40:12.930 --> 00:40:13.590
Tanya: And.
593
00:40:13.590 --> 00:40:19.710
leah: And again, like I get homework. You want to teach these kids responsibility. You want to see if they
594
00:40:20.000 --> 00:40:22.390
leah: what they were taught that day
595
00:40:22.774 --> 00:40:26.669
leah: like. Let's try to get them to do it on their own.
596
00:40:27.170 --> 00:40:27.639
Tanya: Right, yeah.
597
00:40:27.640 --> 00:40:30.649
leah: Right. And I get that. But
598
00:40:30.740 --> 00:40:34.240
leah: again, like you said, There's this 2, this
599
00:40:34.400 --> 00:40:37.110
leah: so much that these kids are doing.
600
00:40:37.110 --> 00:40:37.460
Tanya: Right.
601
00:40:38.720 --> 00:40:39.250
Tanya: Well, I know.
602
00:40:39.250 --> 00:40:40.650
leah: You know, with after school.
603
00:40:40.650 --> 00:40:45.770
Tanya: There which I haven't done my research. But according to my friend who's in the educational environment.
604
00:40:45.780 --> 00:40:53.418
Tanya: I mean, it's not like they're just doing this as a trial. The whole district! It's like they're they're it's
605
00:40:54.590 --> 00:40:57.442
Tanya: What is the word? I can't even
606
00:40:59.230 --> 00:41:01.480
Tanya: well, why can't I think of it right now.
607
00:41:01.900 --> 00:41:03.650
Tanya: Oh, evidence based. It's.
608
00:41:03.650 --> 00:41:04.830
leah: Oh, yeah. Evidence-based.
609
00:41:04.830 --> 00:41:05.720
Tanya: Yeah.
610
00:41:06.870 --> 00:41:09.790
Tanya: So there's research behind it that the kit that
611
00:41:10.280 --> 00:41:14.730
Tanya: I don't know. I I don't know exactly. Maybe I need to do a little bit more research around it myself.
612
00:41:14.920 --> 00:41:18.879
Tanya: And Alison's explained it to me before. But basically the kids do it.
613
00:41:19.170 --> 00:41:20.210
Tanya: It doesn't
614
00:41:21.240 --> 00:41:23.490
Tanya: almost like it does more harm than good.
615
00:41:23.640 --> 00:41:25.070
leah: Yes, exactly.
616
00:41:25.070 --> 00:41:25.440
Tanya: Right.
617
00:41:25.440 --> 00:41:28.260
leah: Exactly. Yup, Yup.
618
00:41:28.660 --> 00:41:32.139
leah: cause these kids there's there's a lot of demand on these kids.
619
00:41:32.140 --> 00:41:33.035
Tanya: Right
620
00:41:33.930 --> 00:41:36.839
leah: It's important to do other activities. It's important to.
621
00:41:36.840 --> 00:41:37.430
Tanya: Yes.
622
00:41:37.430 --> 00:41:46.669
leah: Like for Ellie with her Adhd. She needs to move. So it's important for her to play sports. It's important for her to go ride her bike outside.
623
00:41:47.168 --> 00:41:57.690
Tanya: Oh, my gosh, and with the yeah, with the obesity. Epidemic in our country being the way it is, I think it's like something upwards of like 85%, something like that.
624
00:41:57.690 --> 00:41:58.380
leah: Yeah.
625
00:41:58.380 --> 00:42:00.100
Tanya: Did you know that in our country that.
626
00:42:00.100 --> 00:42:00.550
leah: I did.
627
00:42:00.550 --> 00:42:01.710
Tanya: People are obese.
628
00:42:01.710 --> 00:42:02.330
leah: Yeah.
629
00:42:02.330 --> 00:42:05.699
Tanya: So yeah, Moo. And movement is medicine. These.
630
00:42:05.700 --> 00:42:07.599
leah: It is, it is.
631
00:42:07.600 --> 00:42:08.090
Tanya: They need to.
632
00:42:08.090 --> 00:42:09.140
leah: So.
633
00:42:09.140 --> 00:42:10.860
Tanya: Physical activity.
634
00:42:10.860 --> 00:42:14.919
leah: Yeah. So again, I I love that. This school says
635
00:42:14.950 --> 00:42:16.960
leah: no more than 20 min.
636
00:42:16.960 --> 00:42:17.590
Tanya: Yeah.
637
00:42:18.070 --> 00:42:19.770
leah: Okay, great. And she's
638
00:42:19.990 --> 00:42:34.249
leah: I mean she had such a great year homework, I mean, yeah, we had the occasional like, oh, I don't want to do my homework. I I get it, but it's it's your responsibility to get your homework done. If you're struggling, ask your father or myself.
639
00:42:34.620 --> 00:42:37.230
leah: and if we can't help you, then
640
00:42:37.410 --> 00:42:49.989
leah: put it aside. Go to homework, flex email, your teacher. I was struggling with Problem number 8 on the math worksheet, you know and call it a day. So nobody's stressed out. No one's yelling.
641
00:42:50.230 --> 00:42:50.960
Tanya: Right. You.
642
00:42:50.960 --> 00:42:53.059
leah: Gotta get this done like there's none of that.
643
00:42:53.330 --> 00:42:53.760
Tanya: Right.
644
00:42:53.760 --> 00:42:56.110
leah: So that's been. That's been huge, too.
645
00:42:56.840 --> 00:42:57.860
Tanya: Oh, God.
646
00:42:58.090 --> 00:42:59.130
Tanya: yeah. And then.
647
00:42:59.140 --> 00:43:02.439
Tanya: what do you know now?
648
00:43:02.550 --> 00:43:07.959
Tanya: Or what have you learned that you wish you had known in the beginning of all this.
649
00:43:09.530 --> 00:43:11.183
leah: Oh, man!
650
00:43:14.900 --> 00:43:16.520
leah: What I know.
651
00:43:17.860 --> 00:43:18.610
leah: No
652
00:43:19.990 --> 00:43:25.260
leah: man. You just gotta like I I said it before. You just gotta go
653
00:43:25.330 --> 00:43:31.160
leah: with your gut with anything is parenting. If you think something is, is not right.
654
00:43:31.500 --> 00:43:36.569
leah: ask the questions like, jump on it. Don't, don't be afraid, don't wait.
655
00:43:36.570 --> 00:43:36.890
Tanya: Right down.
656
00:43:36.890 --> 00:43:41.660
leah: Somebody say like, Oh, hey! I noticed this, that and the other thing
657
00:43:43.000 --> 00:43:46.600
leah: like, just go again. Go with your gut with anything.
658
00:43:46.600 --> 00:43:47.350
Tanya: Okay. Good.
659
00:43:47.350 --> 00:43:52.969
leah: Not just, you know, your kids, you know, with the learning disabilities, anything really.
660
00:43:53.310 --> 00:43:54.130
Tanya: Yeah.
661
00:43:54.790 --> 00:44:06.780
Tanya: And then, if there is a parent out there whose child was just diagnosed with dyslexia, what do you think is the most important next step
662
00:44:06.970 --> 00:44:08.129
Tanya: for them to take.
663
00:44:09.730 --> 00:44:20.889
leah: Next step, because I'm said it before. You don't want those gaps to widen, so stay on top of the Iep. Make sure the services
664
00:44:21.140 --> 00:44:22.460
leah: are.
665
00:44:22.770 --> 00:44:34.260
leah: you know they they call it a service grid in the Iep. So like, let's say, your your kids supposed to get. I don't know. I'm just making up numbers here, you know, one to one reading, you know.
666
00:44:34.510 --> 00:44:40.920
leah: 3 times 30 min. So what's that? 30, 60 like 90 min a week? Let's say.
667
00:44:41.886 --> 00:44:43.909
leah: make sure that's happening.
668
00:44:44.390 --> 00:44:47.610
Tanya: So is that what they're doing at school, you mean.
669
00:44:47.900 --> 00:44:51.300
leah: Oh, yes, yeah, depending on someone's iep.
670
00:44:52.129 --> 00:44:52.909
leah: They'll get.
671
00:44:52.910 --> 00:44:53.319
Tanya: To have.
672
00:44:53.320 --> 00:44:54.240
leah: Help, for.
673
00:44:55.260 --> 00:44:56.960
Tanya: How do you make sure that's happening?
674
00:44:57.580 --> 00:44:59.599
Tanya: If you're not in the classroom so.
675
00:44:59.600 --> 00:45:01.380
leah: So for
676
00:45:02.260 --> 00:45:09.309
leah: so for Otto, my 5 year old, I'm just gonna use his him as an example. He has down syndrome, as you know
677
00:45:10.750 --> 00:45:16.730
leah: and he's not that he's nonverbal, but he can't come home and tell me in a full
678
00:45:17.200 --> 00:45:19.150
leah: 2 or 3 sentences.
679
00:45:19.270 --> 00:45:22.709
leah: how his day was who he saw for specialist.
680
00:45:22.960 --> 00:45:32.849
leah: So he comes home with a daily journal, a log. Okay. He had speech today check, and I know that he got his 30 min of speech that day
681
00:45:33.310 --> 00:45:35.900
leah: for a kid like Ellie.
682
00:45:35.970 --> 00:45:39.590
leah: I could say, Okay, did you see, miss? So and so?
683
00:45:39.990 --> 00:45:51.860
leah: And if she says yes or no, I. Unfortunately, I had to kind of keep track of it on my own. So that's 1 suggestion I would make is make sure it's happening. Keep a log.
684
00:45:52.250 --> 00:46:02.159
leah: See if see if they're if your school, if your school or the teachers will do a little log checking off that they receive those services.
685
00:46:02.410 --> 00:46:05.540
leah: But mainly. I would ask Ellie, did you see
686
00:46:05.950 --> 00:46:15.740
leah: so and so today, like you were supposed to? If she says yes or no, you'll you'll be able to tell if it's a pattern, if they're missing sessions when you talk to your kid.
687
00:46:16.340 --> 00:46:18.280
Tanya: Okay, like, I guess
688
00:46:18.540 --> 00:46:29.409
Tanya: what I wanted to know, too, is so they're diagnosed with dyslexia. Do they know, when does the parent know we need to
689
00:46:29.560 --> 00:46:35.530
Tanya: seek more help like we need to look for a school that specializes in dyslexia.
690
00:46:37.200 --> 00:46:38.700
leah: like. Well, you have to.
691
00:46:38.700 --> 00:46:39.170
Tanya: Progress.
692
00:46:39.170 --> 00:46:44.449
leah: It's going to be at the progress meetings and the data that the school's collecting.
693
00:46:44.470 --> 00:46:49.719
leah: What grade level are they reading at? Is this gap closing.
694
00:46:50.240 --> 00:46:55.230
leah: I I mean they'll get testing through the district every year. They have to.
695
00:46:55.230 --> 00:46:56.110
Tanya: Okay.
696
00:46:56.110 --> 00:46:57.550
leah: They have to
697
00:46:58.160 --> 00:47:00.039
leah: do that to track.
698
00:47:00.600 --> 00:47:02.300
leah: You know their progress.
699
00:47:03.370 --> 00:47:04.769
Tanya: Okay. So they have.
700
00:47:04.770 --> 00:47:05.270
leah: And you'll.
701
00:47:05.270 --> 00:47:05.940
Tanya: You guys have.
702
00:47:05.940 --> 00:47:06.360
leah: You.
703
00:47:06.360 --> 00:47:07.240
Tanya: Meetings.
704
00:47:08.100 --> 00:47:10.319
leah: Yeah. So typically, we have
705
00:47:10.900 --> 00:47:16.420
leah: a progress meeting. And then we usually have the Yearly meeting.
706
00:47:16.670 --> 00:47:21.310
leah: And that's to just go over the Iep or things being met.
707
00:47:22.205 --> 00:47:25.959
leah: Is she? Are you reach? Are they reaching their goals?
708
00:47:26.280 --> 00:47:27.680
leah: That sort of thing?
709
00:47:28.720 --> 00:47:29.710
Tanya: Okay.
710
00:47:30.890 --> 00:47:32.720
Tanya: And then, if they're not.
711
00:47:34.060 --> 00:47:37.150
leah: Then you can kind of push for more. If you feel like
712
00:47:37.330 --> 00:47:39.920
leah: this isn't working in our district.
713
00:47:40.170 --> 00:47:45.020
leah: you know. You might want to consider an advocate to look through everything.
714
00:47:45.280 --> 00:47:50.349
leah: And you know, especially if somebody isn't in the education world.
715
00:47:50.490 --> 00:47:53.719
leah: And you just kind of don't know. Yeah.
716
00:47:53.720 --> 00:47:54.290
Tanya: To leave me.
717
00:47:54.290 --> 00:47:57.679
leah: Have. Yeah. So you would have someone to kind of
718
00:47:58.000 --> 00:48:02.669
leah: bounce ideas off. And don't be afraid to like I have. You know
719
00:48:02.770 --> 00:48:04.120
leah: you like
720
00:48:04.150 --> 00:48:06.780
leah: reach out to the people that you know.
721
00:48:06.820 --> 00:48:11.853
leah: that are in the field that can help you, because sometimes they might save you some money.
722
00:48:12.580 --> 00:48:14.240
Tanya: I, yeah.
723
00:48:14.500 --> 00:48:16.170
Tanya: yeah, so that's.
724
00:48:16.170 --> 00:48:21.179
leah: We've been. I've been very lucky in that aspect of having a lot of friends in the field.
725
00:48:21.670 --> 00:48:23.909
leah: you know, working the field
726
00:48:23.930 --> 00:48:25.632
leah: a little bit.
727
00:48:26.680 --> 00:48:27.790
leah: So that's like, yeah.
728
00:48:27.790 --> 00:48:30.790
Tanya: But if you don't, then fine, if you don't
729
00:48:30.870 --> 00:48:32.030
Tanya: find those Facebook.
730
00:48:32.030 --> 00:48:33.530
leah: Not exactly.
731
00:48:33.530 --> 00:48:34.770
Tanya: That way, and.
732
00:48:34.770 --> 00:48:35.290
leah: Yes.
733
00:48:35.290 --> 00:48:36.090
Tanya: Questions.
734
00:48:36.090 --> 00:48:36.670
leah: Ask? What?
735
00:48:36.670 --> 00:48:38.789
Tanya: Dyslexia support groups.
736
00:48:39.000 --> 00:48:46.730
Tanya: These are people that have. Probably if they're in a support group, they've probably they probably have a lot of experience with it, right.
737
00:48:46.730 --> 00:48:49.520
leah: Yes, and a lot of suggestions, and a lot of
738
00:48:51.050 --> 00:48:51.490
Tanya: You can learn.
739
00:48:51.490 --> 00:48:59.619
leah: Recommendation. Exactly, exactly so. Honestly. I would say the one big like
740
00:48:59.700 --> 00:49:02.009
leah: like we said, if we go back to resources.
741
00:49:02.828 --> 00:49:06.580
leah: The biggest thing is finding those Facebook groups.
742
00:49:06.880 --> 00:49:07.350
Tanya: Yeah.
743
00:49:07.718 --> 00:49:09.189
leah: Of parents that have
744
00:49:09.360 --> 00:49:12.220
leah: been there done this still going through it
745
00:49:12.610 --> 00:49:17.319
leah: graduated, you know, their kids are graduated, but maybe they're still part of the group.
746
00:49:17.450 --> 00:49:25.830
leah: yeah, and and go based on on their recommendations and their experiences. You'll know, like maybe, what road to go down and what not to go down.
747
00:49:26.390 --> 00:49:27.000
Tanya: Okay.
748
00:49:27.000 --> 00:49:33.443
leah: You know, or when to. I see a lot of question of on like that Facebook group that I'm talking about.
749
00:49:34.660 --> 00:49:37.560
leah: you know. What point do I
750
00:49:37.900 --> 00:49:41.109
leah: start looking at another school? Because the district.
751
00:49:41.110 --> 00:49:41.720
Tanya: Yeah.
752
00:49:41.720 --> 00:49:47.669
leah: You know, things in my district just don't seem my kid doesn't seem to be progressing like they should.
753
00:49:48.420 --> 00:49:49.889
Tanya: Right, yeah.
754
00:49:49.890 --> 00:49:50.660
leah: So.
755
00:49:51.150 --> 00:49:51.940
leah: yeah.
756
00:49:53.710 --> 00:49:55.300
Tanya: Yeah. And I'm wondering.
757
00:49:55.580 --> 00:49:59.490
Tanya: I wonder, too, cause I I do this myself. I
758
00:49:59.530 --> 00:50:02.619
Tanya: I wonder if some of those parents
759
00:50:02.730 --> 00:50:06.605
Tanya: second, guess himself like am I being too
760
00:50:07.860 --> 00:50:12.569
Tanya: high strung about the or I don't know if I want to say like high strung or
761
00:50:14.170 --> 00:50:15.299
leah: Over the top.
762
00:50:15.480 --> 00:50:23.619
Tanya: Yeah. Am I being too over the top? Or is this something that is a concern? Is this something that I should
763
00:50:23.910 --> 00:50:25.669
Tanya: be pushing for?
764
00:50:26.410 --> 00:50:26.990
Tanya: Like.
765
00:50:26.990 --> 00:50:27.420
leah: And so.
766
00:50:27.420 --> 00:50:29.920
Tanya: Or am I just making this a problem when
767
00:50:29.940 --> 00:50:33.039
Tanya: it isn't like? This is just the way that it is. I don't know.
768
00:50:33.630 --> 00:50:37.370
leah: No, I feel like when it comes to your kids education.
769
00:50:37.460 --> 00:50:47.479
leah: And you know, I'm no expert. This is just a mom talking when it comes to your kids education. I feel like you can't be too over the top.
770
00:50:47.890 --> 00:50:49.099
Tanya: Thank you. Yeah.
771
00:50:49.100 --> 00:50:49.800
leah: Guys.
772
00:50:49.800 --> 00:50:51.400
Tanya: Oh, good. Yeah.
773
00:50:51.970 --> 00:50:55.220
leah: You know you want your child, and I've always said this in our
774
00:50:55.990 --> 00:51:05.300
leah: and on her Iep. There's like a little parent section where you can like, you know. Write your hopes for your child, or whatever I forget the
775
00:51:05.550 --> 00:51:09.083
leah: technical name for that section.
776
00:51:10.300 --> 00:51:13.340
leah: but I always. We've always said, you know we
777
00:51:13.360 --> 00:51:15.530
leah: we want Ellie to
778
00:51:15.770 --> 00:51:24.280
leah: love learning. They succeed and love going to school. And it was getting to that point where it was like a fight, but after this new school.
779
00:51:24.540 --> 00:51:27.300
leah: and it hasn't been which has been huge.
780
00:51:27.300 --> 00:51:28.640
Tanya: So enterprise.
781
00:51:28.640 --> 00:51:30.210
leah: Yeah. Yeah.
782
00:51:30.630 --> 00:51:34.699
leah: The other thing I want to say is, I really wish
783
00:51:34.960 --> 00:51:38.539
leah: and I hope that it at some point it
784
00:51:38.650 --> 00:51:42.259
leah: it happens is, I feel like
785
00:51:43.070 --> 00:51:47.720
leah: if we could just do earlier screening for learning disabilities
786
00:51:48.040 --> 00:51:49.592
leah: that would save
787
00:51:50.460 --> 00:51:53.569
leah: so much time, energy, tears
788
00:51:53.730 --> 00:51:58.209
leah: on a parent's part, on the kids part. Most importantly.
789
00:51:58.590 --> 00:51:59.080
Tanya: Yeah.
790
00:51:59.627 --> 00:52:04.550
leah: If we could just identify those learning disabilities earlier.
791
00:52:05.960 --> 00:52:09.460
leah: you could avoid so much heartache.
792
00:52:10.080 --> 00:52:10.550
Tanya: Yeah.
793
00:52:10.550 --> 00:52:18.489
leah: And you know, with you and your kid, because, you know, when your kids struggling you, it's it. It hurts your heart.
794
00:52:19.420 --> 00:52:20.500
Tanya: Of course.
795
00:52:20.500 --> 00:52:23.369
leah: You know, cause there's only so much
796
00:52:25.470 --> 00:52:29.932
leah: you know you can do as a parent, too, and you always want the best for your kid.
797
00:52:31.080 --> 00:52:31.700
leah: So.
798
00:52:31.700 --> 00:52:32.180
Tanya: Yeah.
799
00:52:32.180 --> 00:52:36.899
leah: Earlier screening. I really wish that that would be a thing and not.
800
00:52:36.900 --> 00:52:37.240
Tanya: Yeah.
801
00:52:37.240 --> 00:52:38.809
leah: Because I mean right now.
802
00:52:38.810 --> 00:52:53.850
Tanya: Like. It's kindergarten, right? Because I know like for Lucia, I remember like reports coming home and saying like your child does not have dyslexia essentially is what it said. So I know in kindergarten is where they start it. Here is that where they started
803
00:52:54.260 --> 00:52:55.700
Tanya: in Massachusetts.
804
00:52:56.540 --> 00:53:00.949
leah: Well, I mean she it was kindergarten that she was
805
00:53:01.280 --> 00:53:07.820
leah: approved for that like title, one reading, which was some extra services, but they never came out, and was like.
806
00:53:07.820 --> 00:53:08.990
Tanya: Screen for it. There.
807
00:53:08.990 --> 00:53:13.160
leah: Yeah, I yeah, I mean, it was so long. I feel like it was so long ago.
808
00:53:13.160 --> 00:53:13.650
Tanya: Yeah.
809
00:53:13.971 --> 00:53:19.429
leah: But yeah, I just wish earlier screening would happen, and parents would have to say, like, Hey.
810
00:53:19.620 --> 00:53:21.599
leah: do you think we should test
811
00:53:22.920 --> 00:53:23.930
leah: right? Like.
812
00:53:23.930 --> 00:53:24.320
Tanya: Yeah, like.
813
00:53:24.320 --> 00:53:25.190
leah: You know what it means.
814
00:53:25.190 --> 00:53:26.689
Tanya: Don't have to bring it up, but they just.
815
00:53:26.690 --> 00:53:27.640
leah: Yeah.
816
00:53:27.640 --> 00:53:30.520
Tanya: Like it sounds like that's what they do here, at least.
817
00:53:30.520 --> 00:53:32.130
leah: Yeah, live, cause, yeah.
818
00:53:32.130 --> 00:53:36.200
Tanya: Like I didn't have to. It was just something that was done. Yeah, cool.
819
00:53:36.200 --> 00:53:37.099
leah: Yeah, nice.
820
00:53:37.420 --> 00:53:45.629
leah: So if earlier screening to identify those learning disabilities, so kids don't get so far behind because.
821
00:53:45.630 --> 00:53:46.309
Tanya: And I think.
822
00:53:46.310 --> 00:53:46.650
leah: Don't!
823
00:53:46.650 --> 00:54:02.059
Tanya: Compounds the issue like you mentioned her confidence level. And then, once the confidence came back, then she was able to excel, and I do think that the confidence thing, and not having it, creates like a block
824
00:54:02.170 --> 00:54:02.729
Tanya: in the.
825
00:54:02.730 --> 00:54:05.250
leah: Yes. Yes. Yup.
826
00:54:05.810 --> 00:54:07.000
leah: Exactly.
827
00:54:07.170 --> 00:54:08.430
Tanya: Yeah, if you don't
828
00:54:08.470 --> 00:54:11.759
Tanya: have that confidence in yourself.
829
00:54:12.530 --> 00:54:19.189
Tanya: then you're always your brain is going to be programmed to look at the evidence as to like
830
00:54:19.410 --> 00:54:25.259
Tanya: why, like see? I can't. I can't learn, because XY and z like.
831
00:54:25.260 --> 00:54:26.950
leah: Yeah, exactly.
832
00:54:27.440 --> 00:54:28.410
Tanya: Yeah.
833
00:54:30.140 --> 00:54:31.040
Tanya: so
834
00:54:32.310 --> 00:54:35.879
Tanya: well, I'm so glad that you found a school that is.
835
00:54:36.100 --> 00:54:36.930
leah: Yes.
836
00:54:36.930 --> 00:54:40.130
Tanya: That she is able to be supported, and
837
00:54:40.570 --> 00:54:41.470
Tanya: and she's
838
00:54:41.750 --> 00:54:42.360
Tanya: got that.
839
00:54:42.360 --> 00:54:42.760
leah: Yeah.
840
00:54:42.760 --> 00:54:45.349
Tanya: Back because she's surrounded by kids that
841
00:54:46.370 --> 00:54:47.829
Tanya: are just like her.
842
00:54:47.830 --> 00:54:49.760
leah: Exactly, exactly.
843
00:54:49.760 --> 00:54:52.310
Tanya: I mean, not just like her, but they're also.
844
00:54:52.310 --> 00:54:52.740
leah: Yeah.
845
00:54:52.740 --> 00:54:53.260
Tanya: Have.
846
00:54:53.260 --> 00:54:59.260
leah: They all learn in in a way that you know their brains learn just like hers. So.
847
00:54:59.260 --> 00:54:59.820
Tanya: Right.
848
00:54:59.820 --> 00:55:03.970
leah: That's been that's been important is being around or in a school.
849
00:55:05.256 --> 00:55:06.370
leah: Where she's
850
00:55:06.660 --> 00:55:08.570
leah: she's the same as everyone else.
851
00:55:08.570 --> 00:55:09.610
Tanya: Right, yeah.
852
00:55:09.610 --> 00:55:10.060
leah: You know.
853
00:55:10.060 --> 00:55:13.299
Tanya: I'm sure. Yeah, I'm sure there's like an element of it where.
854
00:55:13.610 --> 00:55:20.569
Tanya: you know, we all kind of like hold ourselves back when we we have this fear that we're being judged.
855
00:55:20.900 --> 00:55:21.600
leah: Yeah.
856
00:55:21.600 --> 00:55:23.149
Tanya: Pulled out of class
857
00:55:23.260 --> 00:55:31.850
Tanya: to go to a special education class, or when her peers are seeing, you know, other teachers come into the room.
858
00:55:32.010 --> 00:55:32.350
leah: Yeah.
859
00:55:32.660 --> 00:55:34.899
Tanya: She's getting that special help.
860
00:55:34.900 --> 00:55:40.426
leah: Yeah. So that's been her whole educational career. So
861
00:55:43.180 --> 00:55:49.139
leah: like, I don't think she ever thought anything of it. But we were afraid, like in middle school, it might be a different.
862
00:55:49.140 --> 00:55:49.460
Tanya: Store.
863
00:55:49.460 --> 00:55:51.279
leah: Sorry, no.
864
00:55:51.280 --> 00:55:52.230
Tanya: Yeah, yeah.
865
00:55:52.230 --> 00:55:56.499
leah: So I am glad that she started her new school when she did.
866
00:55:56.500 --> 00:55:57.090
Tanya: Yeah.
867
00:55:57.656 --> 00:55:59.919
leah: Cause. Honestly, if if
868
00:56:00.250 --> 00:56:01.550
leah: we
869
00:56:02.980 --> 00:56:11.289
leah: if she did, started middle school in District and attended their program that they had in place.
870
00:56:12.050 --> 00:56:16.589
leah: I just fear that I would have a different child right now.
871
00:56:16.880 --> 00:56:17.910
Tanya: Yeah.
872
00:56:17.910 --> 00:56:18.899
leah: You know.
873
00:56:19.325 --> 00:56:22.900
leah: I don't even like to go down that road. I just know that
874
00:56:23.290 --> 00:56:27.330
leah: we made the best decision for her to change schools when we did.
875
00:56:27.550 --> 00:56:28.859
Tanya: Yeah, yeah.
876
00:56:29.410 --> 00:56:33.190
leah: I know it in my heart and in my gut. I know that we did the right thing.
877
00:56:33.490 --> 00:56:36.709
Tanya: Yeah, and you guys have, it hasn't been easy.
878
00:56:36.710 --> 00:56:40.159
leah: No, no, it has not. There have been a lot of
879
00:56:40.280 --> 00:56:45.919
leah: sleepless nights. There have been a lot of tears. There's been a lot of
880
00:56:46.867 --> 00:56:47.982
leah: check writing.
881
00:56:48.540 --> 00:56:50.429
Tanya: Yeah, which to me.
882
00:56:50.430 --> 00:56:54.500
leah: I don't want to sit down and add up what we've spent. Yeah, like.
883
00:56:54.500 --> 00:57:02.309
Tanya: That's why I even want to sit down and have this conversation with you, because I literally remember the moment when you were telling me
884
00:57:02.540 --> 00:57:10.639
Tanya: about this and that Ellie was dyslexic, and just all the hoops that you've had to jump through like I remember up at the camp up at the lake.
885
00:57:10.640 --> 00:57:11.320
leah: Yeah.
886
00:57:11.320 --> 00:57:18.820
Tanya: And you were telling me, and I was just like dumbfounded like. I had no idea that.
887
00:57:18.890 --> 00:57:21.179
Tanya: like all that was involved in that, it was just.
888
00:57:22.580 --> 00:57:24.300
leah: Yeah, it's a process.
889
00:57:25.060 --> 00:57:25.750
leah: Yeah.
890
00:57:26.216 --> 00:57:30.879
Tanya: Yeah, I just. I assumed that every school just like
891
00:57:31.100 --> 00:57:33.370
Tanya: knew how to
892
00:57:34.320 --> 00:57:35.990
Tanya: navigate knew how to.
893
00:57:37.070 --> 00:57:43.130
Tanya: I don't know, I guess. Teach and have, like an educational plan with somebody who has dyslexia. I didn't.
894
00:57:43.130 --> 00:57:47.019
leah: Yeah, you just you need to. You need to be on top of it.
895
00:57:47.260 --> 00:57:49.629
leah: need to fight for what your kid needs.
896
00:57:49.950 --> 00:57:51.040
leah: I mean.
897
00:57:51.120 --> 00:57:55.339
leah: it's yeah, because it it even like, if you think about it.
898
00:57:55.580 --> 00:57:59.490
leah: it it costs the district a lot of money to have these.
899
00:57:59.760 --> 00:58:00.350
Tanya: Special like.
900
00:58:00.350 --> 00:58:04.290
leah: Pro specialists and programs in place.
901
00:58:04.760 --> 00:58:05.390
Tanya: Yeah.
902
00:58:05.390 --> 00:58:08.189
leah: So I feel like they.
903
00:58:08.750 --> 00:58:15.890
leah: you know, say, Okay, we'll cut corners. And how can we meet these trial? This child's needs?
904
00:58:16.240 --> 00:58:17.990
leah: And that's great.
905
00:58:18.080 --> 00:58:20.109
leah: but sometimes it's not enough.
906
00:58:20.260 --> 00:58:21.060
Tanya: Yeah.
907
00:58:21.510 --> 00:58:22.410
leah: You know.
908
00:58:23.640 --> 00:58:24.480
leah: So.
909
00:58:24.960 --> 00:58:25.370
Tanya: Yeah.
910
00:58:25.370 --> 00:58:26.120
leah: Anyway.
911
00:58:26.700 --> 00:58:28.040
Tanya: And so
912
00:58:28.100 --> 00:58:30.310
Tanya: I want to ask. I've just got 2 more questions left for you.
913
00:58:30.310 --> 00:58:30.680
leah: Okay.
914
00:58:30.680 --> 00:58:31.590
Tanya: You go.
915
00:58:31.590 --> 00:58:32.130
leah: Alright!
916
00:58:32.130 --> 00:58:38.199
Tanya: What would you say? What good has come out of this challenge for you and your family?
917
00:58:38.740 --> 00:58:39.770
Tanya: And Ellie.
918
00:58:40.680 --> 00:58:42.100
leah: So
919
00:58:43.000 --> 00:58:45.079
leah: I would say.
920
00:58:45.400 --> 00:58:47.420
leah: this has made us
921
00:58:47.700 --> 00:58:49.650
leah: much stronger
922
00:58:49.930 --> 00:58:51.610
leah: as a family unit.
923
00:58:51.790 --> 00:58:56.290
leah: That hasn't been easy, but it definitely has made us stronger.
924
00:58:57.950 --> 00:59:07.670
leah: you know, whenever you're faced with the challenge you're like, Oh, my gosh! How are we going to get through this? But you find a way, and you do it, and it makes you stronger in the end.
925
00:59:07.890 --> 00:59:09.320
leah: for Ellie.
926
00:59:11.580 --> 00:59:13.899
leah: knowing that she has
927
00:59:14.090 --> 00:59:17.430
leah: her parents support behind her.
928
00:59:17.820 --> 00:59:24.110
leah: and are going to do whatever we need to do to get her the proper education that she needs
929
00:59:24.880 --> 00:59:30.049
leah: and this new school and her confidence level, like I keep saying.
930
00:59:30.610 --> 00:59:38.239
leah: and that she's she's. It's a slow process, but she's being remediated. She's made like
931
00:59:38.430 --> 00:59:40.980
leah: a lot of gains for 6th grade.
932
00:59:41.350 --> 00:59:42.050
Tanya: That's so awesome.
933
00:59:42.050 --> 00:59:43.960
leah: So yeah, that's like.
934
00:59:43.960 --> 00:59:44.840
Tanya: Proud of her.
935
00:59:44.840 --> 00:59:45.750
leah: Like that
936
00:59:46.030 --> 00:59:49.159
leah: that feeling that like oh, I can do this.
937
00:59:49.370 --> 00:59:50.670
Tanya: Yeah, like this.
938
00:59:50.670 --> 00:59:51.990
leah: I just needed.
939
00:59:51.990 --> 00:59:52.800
Tanya: Possible.
940
00:59:52.800 --> 00:59:54.910
leah: It's possible. Right? Yeah.
941
00:59:55.650 --> 00:59:57.340
leah: And getting that like
942
00:59:58.680 --> 01:00:02.489
leah: that satisfaction like I did this. I can do this.
943
01:00:02.730 --> 01:00:03.910
Tanya: Yeah.
944
01:00:03.910 --> 01:00:06.159
leah: And I have an army behind me
945
01:00:07.130 --> 01:00:10.940
leah: that here I go. I'm gonna cry again. It's always gonna fight for me.
946
01:00:11.110 --> 01:00:12.380
Tanya: Yeah.
947
01:00:12.900 --> 01:00:15.329
leah: So it's definitely made us
948
01:00:15.650 --> 01:00:18.330
leah: stronger. It's been very challenging.
949
01:00:18.670 --> 01:00:19.190
Tanya: Yeah.
950
01:00:19.190 --> 01:00:20.960
leah: But it's definitely made us stronger.
951
01:00:21.300 --> 01:00:22.140
Tanya: Yeah.
952
01:00:22.400 --> 01:00:28.640
Tanya: Oh, my gosh, Ellie, she's so lucky to have such amazing parents.
953
01:00:29.720 --> 01:00:30.380
leah: Yeah, that's okay.
954
01:00:30.380 --> 01:00:34.069
Tanya: 4 people all around her. She is so
955
01:00:34.160 --> 01:00:36.570
Tanya: fortunate and blessed. You are such a.
956
01:00:36.570 --> 01:00:36.970
leah: Yes.
957
01:00:36.970 --> 01:00:37.990
Tanya: Mom.
958
01:00:38.550 --> 01:00:39.640
leah: You, John, and.
959
01:00:39.640 --> 01:00:41.740
Tanya: Is the best. Dad.
960
01:00:41.960 --> 01:00:42.290
leah: Yeah.
961
01:00:42.290 --> 01:00:43.779
Tanya: Besides Chris.
962
01:00:44.330 --> 01:00:45.760
leah: Besides Chris. Yes.
963
01:00:48.540 --> 01:00:54.280
Tanya: So what would you last question? What would you like to say to any parents out there listening
964
01:00:54.460 --> 01:00:59.070
Tanya: who suspect their child is dyslexic, or
965
01:00:59.180 --> 01:01:12.529
Tanya: maybe they were even like even recently diagnosed. Or maybe they have been struggling for a while, but haven't been able to get the support they need. What would you say to parents? The parents of these kids.
966
01:01:14.980 --> 01:01:15.904
leah: Oh,
967
01:01:17.590 --> 01:01:18.780
leah: Let's see.
968
01:01:19.380 --> 01:01:21.210
leah: I would say.
969
01:01:25.180 --> 01:01:27.989
leah: advocate advocate, advocate.
970
01:01:28.450 --> 01:01:29.150
Tanya: Hmm.
971
01:01:29.150 --> 01:01:35.110
leah: That your child is in the best possible setting, educationally
972
01:01:36.340 --> 01:01:37.105
leah: advocate
973
01:01:38.380 --> 01:01:42.940
leah: that they're getting the services they need to reach their current grade level
974
01:01:43.250 --> 01:01:44.660
leah: and or
975
01:01:45.280 --> 01:01:48.099
leah: working towards their grade level.
976
01:01:48.790 --> 01:01:55.899
leah: because you don't want, and I know I keep saying it. You don't want those gaps to get wider and wider.
977
01:01:56.860 --> 01:01:57.600
Tanya: Yeah.
978
01:01:59.410 --> 01:02:00.030
Tanya: just.
979
01:02:00.030 --> 01:02:03.969
leah: And be and advocate, advocate like a mother.
980
01:02:04.560 --> 01:02:05.170
Tanya: Yeah.
981
01:02:06.779 --> 01:02:09.369
leah: Be patient with your child, whose brain.
982
01:02:09.370 --> 01:02:11.240
Tanya: Differently, yeah.
983
01:02:11.240 --> 01:02:13.000
leah: Really like
984
01:02:13.620 --> 01:02:14.770
leah: the
985
01:02:15.400 --> 01:02:18.949
leah: yeah. Just just be patient with your child.
986
01:02:19.417 --> 01:02:27.450
leah: Kind of take a deep breath and be like, Okay, they don't. I don't learn like them. They don't learn like me. I just have to take a deep breath
987
01:02:27.770 --> 01:02:30.049
leah: and be patient with them right now.
988
01:02:30.090 --> 01:02:34.190
leah: and the other thing is, be supportive
989
01:02:34.740 --> 01:02:39.740
leah: when they are in that moment of frustration and melting down.
990
01:02:40.380 --> 01:02:41.030
Tanya: Yeah.
991
01:02:42.550 --> 01:02:45.590
leah: Because we've had a lot of those days and nights
992
01:02:46.150 --> 01:02:47.770
leah: of melting down.
993
01:02:47.940 --> 01:02:50.320
Tanya: I bet. And what do you do?
994
01:02:51.750 --> 01:02:53.019
leah: You just. I'm eating that.
995
01:02:53.020 --> 01:02:53.680
Tanya: Moment.
996
01:02:53.910 --> 01:03:01.229
leah: I have. It's okay. We're gonna get through, be supportive. It's okay. We're gonna get through this. We're gonna get you the help that you need.
997
01:03:01.470 --> 01:03:03.800
Tanya: Yeah, we're gonna do that to do this alone.
998
01:03:03.800 --> 01:03:04.579
leah: You're not. Yeah.
999
01:03:04.580 --> 01:03:05.240
Tanya: So long.
1000
01:03:05.240 --> 01:03:07.520
leah: Exactly. Exactly.
1001
01:03:07.670 --> 01:03:08.650
leah: So.
1002
01:03:08.930 --> 01:03:09.880
leah: yeah.
1003
01:03:10.070 --> 01:03:21.240
Tanya: Oh, I love that! And I do want to end, too, because I was telling Leah how I was looking up all of the extremely successful people out.
1004
01:03:21.240 --> 01:03:21.780
leah: Oh, yeah.
1005
01:03:21.780 --> 01:03:37.669
Tanya: Have dyslexia, and I had to like I was googling it, and I had to stop writing because there were just so many of them, but I just want to name some of them. So if your kid, if you have a kid and you're listening, and your kid has dyslexia, fear not like
1006
01:03:38.400 --> 01:03:40.600
Tanya: it's not
1007
01:03:41.430 --> 01:03:43.040
leah: It's not uncommon.
1008
01:03:43.040 --> 01:03:48.339
Tanya: It. It's not uncommon, and it's not any indication of, you know
1009
01:03:49.280 --> 01:03:51.819
Tanya: their success or failure, and.
1010
01:03:52.140 --> 01:03:53.150
leah: Exactly.
1011
01:03:53.150 --> 01:03:55.560
Tanya: Like. Look at all these people who have.
1012
01:03:55.990 --> 01:03:56.740
leah: Yeah.
1013
01:03:56.740 --> 01:04:11.189
Tanya: Amazing success. In every definition of the word. So Muhammad Ali, Jennifer, Aniston, Orlando Bloom, Mel Robbins, Dean, Graziosi, Lewis Howes, Erin Brockovich.
1014
01:04:11.220 --> 01:04:19.930
Tanya: Cher, Jim Carrey Anderson Cooper, Tom Cruise, Patrick Dempsey, Whoopi Goldberg, and I had to just stop there because there were so many.
1015
01:04:19.930 --> 01:04:21.139
leah: The list goes on.
1016
01:04:21.600 --> 01:04:23.470
Tanya: Yeah, so.
1017
01:04:23.690 --> 01:04:26.859
leah: And oh, one other thing well, I'll I will end with.
1018
01:04:27.130 --> 01:04:27.550
Tanya: Yes.
1019
01:04:27.550 --> 01:04:28.510
leah: Is.
1020
01:04:29.420 --> 01:04:35.330
leah: and this is advice that well, not advice. This was some like I said. I said it in the beginning.
1021
01:04:36.870 --> 01:04:38.179
leah: Ellie was
1022
01:04:38.470 --> 01:04:42.350
leah: told that her superpower is called dyslexia.
1023
01:04:42.550 --> 01:04:43.590
leah: and
1024
01:04:43.770 --> 01:04:51.679
leah: if your kid has recently been diagnosed with dyslexia, you tell them that's your superpower, and that really has
1025
01:04:51.900 --> 01:04:59.030
leah: has resonated with Ellie and it it she's like, Yeah, my superpower is dyslexia like, so what's yours?
1026
01:04:59.280 --> 01:05:00.270
Tanya: Right.
1027
01:05:00.790 --> 01:05:02.660
leah: To go with that. Tell your kids
1028
01:05:03.050 --> 01:05:06.509
leah: they have a superpower called dyslexia, and they're awesome.
1029
01:05:07.210 --> 01:05:09.800
Tanya: Yeah. And I feel like it makes them
1030
01:05:10.190 --> 01:05:14.830
Tanya: really resourceful and excellent problem solvers. But.
1031
01:05:14.830 --> 01:05:15.440
leah: Oh, yeah.
1032
01:05:15.440 --> 01:05:21.730
Tanya: Teaches them when they're young like. It's more difficult than most
1033
01:05:21.940 --> 01:05:30.469
Tanya: for them to learn, because they have this disability where it makes it just makes learning a little bit more difficult. Right? Yes.
1034
01:05:30.590 --> 01:05:31.360
Tanya: go.
1035
01:05:31.550 --> 01:05:35.599
Tanya: And you compare it to the kids who, you know, learning just comes easy.
1036
01:05:35.700 --> 01:05:40.529
Tanya: So then they go through life. They go through their childhood, and everything's just easy for them.
1037
01:05:40.610 --> 01:05:48.070
Tanya: Well, until you know adolescence and adulthood kicks in, and you know they don't have their parents to support them anymore.
1038
01:05:48.220 --> 01:05:51.330
Tanya: Then it's like, all yeah, life is fucking hard.
1039
01:05:51.330 --> 01:05:52.130
leah: Yeah.
1040
01:05:52.930 --> 01:05:55.970
Tanya: And it just like they don't have that
1041
01:05:58.330 --> 01:06:00.019
Tanya: I don't know. And I just feel like
1042
01:06:00.270 --> 01:06:05.589
Tanya: people who have dyslexia like they're just. They're used to that like
1043
01:06:06.060 --> 01:06:09.060
Tanya: their whole life. It's been challenging.
1044
01:06:09.060 --> 01:06:09.620
leah: Yeah.
1045
01:06:09.620 --> 01:06:11.890
Tanya: Like they're that much more equipped to
1046
01:06:11.910 --> 01:06:13.860
Tanya: deal with the challenges.
1047
01:06:14.140 --> 01:06:16.290
leah: Exactly. Yeah.
1048
01:06:17.180 --> 01:06:18.510
leah: so, true.
1049
01:06:19.290 --> 01:06:22.280
Tanya: All right. Well, thank you so much, Leah, for.
1050
01:06:22.610 --> 01:06:23.860
Tanya: On, and.
1051
01:06:23.860 --> 01:06:25.300
leah: You for having me.
1052
01:06:25.300 --> 01:06:34.359
Tanya: Sharing your experience and your wisdom, and I know this is going to help so many people out there, and I honor you and respect you, and.
1053
01:06:34.360 --> 01:06:34.980
leah: Thank you.
1054
01:06:34.980 --> 01:06:37.580
Tanya: I just. You are the best.
1055
01:06:37.760 --> 01:06:42.340
Tanya: mother, and I'm just so impressed with all
1056
01:06:42.790 --> 01:06:43.550
Tanya: just
1057
01:06:44.800 --> 01:06:48.470
Tanya: all the work and effort and time that you've put in to.
1058
01:06:48.470 --> 01:06:48.790
leah: Yeah.
1059
01:06:48.790 --> 01:06:53.050
Tanya: Advocating for Ellie and Otto, too. Yeah, so
1060
01:06:53.250 --> 01:06:54.979
Tanya: thank you so much.
1061
01:06:54.980 --> 01:06:56.590
leah: I love you too.
1062
01:06:56.590 --> 01:07:00.169
Tanya: Alright. Well, we'll talk to you later. Thank you again so much for coming on.
1063
01:07:00.170 --> 01:07:01.920
leah: Absolutely anytime.