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How to Stop Being So Exhausted

Tanya Valentine

Have you ever got a good nights sleep and wondered why you still feel exhausted? There could be many reasons for this, your diet, stress. But I want to talk about something that you may not have realized could be stealing your energy, and that's indecision.


After reading this blog post, you should have a better understanding of how indecision causes fatigue and I'm going to share with you a process that will help improve your decision making skills so you can stop feeling so exhausted.


Making decisions produces energy. It is so important to make a decision and get to a yes or a no. The first thing I want to talk about is the problem with delaying decisions. There is something you are considering doing (maybe it's signing up for a program, looking for a new job, whether or not to have another baby), but you are telling yourself you can't make the decision right now. You think It's not the right time, or you don't have the mental energy to do that right now so you'll deal with it later. By so doing, you have actually made a decision. You have decided "no" to doing the thing, but it is actually what we call a passive "no". And the problem with a passive "no" is there is no power behind it. What you are actually doing is choosing to stay stuck in indecision. You go back and forth with it. You tell yourself you don't have enough information, time or money. You are considering doing the thing, but not taking action on it. I love what I heard my teacher, Brooke Castillo, say about indecision,"It burns up fuel that you could be using to achieve something in your life and it creates a lot of uncreated dissipated energy that doesn't manifest in the world."


An example of this is when I was making the decision whether or not to return to work after having our 3rd child. I spent months agonizing over the decision. I wouldn't say that I spent every waking hour consciously thinking about it, but it was always at the back of my mind, nagging at me. When you have decisions in a queue taking up valuable brain space, what happens is you don't give things in your life the full attention that they deserve. You might make mistakes, you forget things, you're not fully present in any given moment. Then one day, I made the decision in an instant. It was a hard "no" on returning to work. I suddenly had all of this energy to put towards my kids and my efforts on creating the coaching business that I have today.


One thing I learned from Tony Robbins is that when you have the motivation to do something, you must take action on it immediately before the primitive brain is activated, before the doubt creeps in and offers all of the reasons why it would be a bad idea. That's how we've been programmed, not to be impulsive, to be cautious, not to take risks. But guess what the most successful people in the world do? They take risks. You have to take risks in order to get what you want out of life. You want a partner? You must risk getting your heart broken. You want a baby? Not to be morbid, but you do risk your life when you make the decision to get pregnant, and of course there is always the risk of losing the baby. But it's worth it because the best case scenario is that you have this beautiful miracle of a child.


There are no wrong decisions until you decide that you've made a wrong decision. If you want to argue that a job you had in the past was a wrong decision, or your ex was a wrong decision, it's important that you know these decisions were necessary in order to get you here. It was all apart of a greater plan. It was always supposed to be this way. When you get in the habit of thinking you made a wrong decision (aka regret) you build this distrust within yourself, which then compounds the indecision. You use the evidence of your past (this decision you made that you are believing was bad) to prove to yourself why you can't be trusted to make a decision, and why you need to be very cautious and take time in all future decisions. But decisions are made in an instant. You can spend all of this time and energy contemplating, worrying about it, or avoiding it. Ultimately when you make the decision, that's it, the decision is made. All of the time you spent "trying to make the decision" was only time and energy wasted indulging in confusion.


So if there's a decision you have been hemming and hawing over, allow me to help you decide once and for all so that you can release the power from that decision and gain the energy required to propel you forward:


  1. Get out a piece of paper and pen and make 2 columns. In the first column you will write the decision you have been considering (for example maybe it's leaving your job). And in the other column you will write down what you are choosing when you decide "no" on what you've been considering (so in this example it would be to stay at your job).

  2. under each column, write down your answer to these 4 questions:

  • If I could be happy either way, which decision would I choose?


  • Which decision brings me closer to who I want to be even if I fail?


  • If I choose this decision, what's the best case scenario in 3 years from now?


  • If I were to flip a coin to make this decision, which one would produce more excitement? Which one would I be disappointed over?


In next weeks post I will share more strategies to combat decision fatigue. In the meantime, I hope if this makes sense to you, that you apply it to your life. I know if you do, you will find you save yourself time, energy, frustration, and all over should feel less exhausted.


For more strategies, tools, and insights designed to motivate, inspire, and help you live your best life, be sure to scroll down to the bottom of this page and subscribe to my email list! I only send out newsletters twice a month (every other Monday) and then notifications when a new blog post is published as well as any promotions I'm running. Also, be sure to check out my 2 free offers! If you want to start exercising more consistently, click here for my free e-book on developing the mindset required to working out consistently. This will redirect you to the homepage of my website. And if you scroll down a little bit you will see where you can gain access to my free e-book "Kickstart Your Weight Loss This Week In Just 6 Simple Steps".


Have an amazing week!


With so much love, admiration, and respect,


Tanya :)



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